The Missing Piece

Chapter 16

Narae thanked her Kakao driver when he pulled up to the curb.

"Are you sure you're alright?" He'd asked as she went to get out of the cab. It was a mark of how bad Narae must have looked that the usually anonymous driver had bothered to speak at all. She gave him a weak smile and said she'd be fine before closing the door and setting off on foot.

Everyone agreed it would look a little conspicuous if she asked to be dropped off within the community, and everyone was being ultra careful at the moment, so Narae was walking through the complex to the block which housed the BTS apartment.

Whether it was just her own body behaving badly, she didn't know, but it felt like today was the first properly wintry weather day in Seoul and the cold bit at her nose and the tops of her ears as she pulled her coat around herself. It hardly mattered at this point. Narae was a wreck.

The first time the boys had left her hadn't been too bad. It had only been two days after all. She had their recent confessions of love for her, an article of clothing each and even the surprise gift of Jungkook's scent to see her through. Also, because they were all still new to this, the boys didn't react well either, so they were constantly texting and phoning her to check-in which eased her worried mind a little. It had been bleak, but nothing she hadn't been able to handle. They'd had a couple of small separations since then, all of which had been unhappy times for Narae.

But this separation had been over a week.

The studio had thought out a couple of legitimate ways she could come with them, but Narae's hair and makeup course had a supervised practical that week and because she needed to legitimately pass this course, she'd decided that she needed to stay. The sooner she was done, the sooner she could be placed permanently onto the Cordi team and the sooner she could stay with them when they went away.

The week had started out just like usual and Narae had taken advantage of their absence by trying to catch up with some sorely neglected friends and family members. She couldn't tell any of them what was really going on in her life, so she'd lied, over and over again about how she was and how she spent her days. Her soulmates, with whom she just couldn't seem to settle her bonds, were away for eight days because they were performing at the MAMAs and she felt like she was bleeding to death on the inside. But she couldn't say any of that, not to anyone she knew, and not even to the boys themselves.

Now, at the end of her torturous week, Narae trudged weakly to their building and let herself in. She might have looked woefully out of place for this neighbourhood, but no one took any notice of her because she had all the right keys and codes. She had to be a bit careful, they'd told her, to be inconspicuous when actually going into their property. If she was stopped, she was to say she was an aide or a cleaner and try to make it believable.

As soon as she got through the door, Narae had told herself, she was going to be allowed five minutes of crazy before she got her game-face on. All week she'd been in a steady decline. Her mood, her self-care, her appearance, her communication had gone downhill, and she'd only rallied every now and again when Jimin or Seokjin were able to video call her and needed to see her doing well. They'd be back here in just over an hour and they didn't need to know what a wreck she'd become in their absence.

She unlocked the door and went in, carefully placing her shoes out of the way. The combined smell of all her mates hit her like a wall between the universe she'd been living in all week and the one in which she could breathe again. Their scents carried the oxygen she needed into her lungs and filled her up. She choked out a sob at how happy it made her. Time and time again, she'd thought about coming here in their absence, but she knew she'd be found out and she wanted them to know she was fine. Although she wasn't fine. Now thought she breathed it in like she might never have the chance to. She hurried through quickly to Seokjin's room which he now shared with her and Jimin, and fell gasping into the bed. She whimpered into the blankets and pillows and allowed the feeling of them to wrap around her.