The Missing Piece

Chapter 24

After Namjoon's intervention, all three of the rebels had gone their separate ways and over the course of the night, had confessed the whole sorry situation to their bonded mates.

The next morning, all eight of them gathered in the kitchen for a brief recap of all the rules before work started. Jungkook and Taehyung stood in the protective circles of their older mates, much like they had done in the first few days of bonding when everyone was still very insecure. They looked downcast but had spent most of the night being coddled by needy soulmates, so they weren't too badly off. Namjoon, Yoongi and Hoseok had all promised separately to make up for the lack of interaction they'd have with their friends. Jungkook and Taehyung had both doubted this but had no choice except compliance.

Narae stood off to the side with Jimin and Seokjin next to her, still bristling with unhappiness. It had been a terrible conversation to tell them what she had been doing, but also to realise that they only cared because their pride was hurt. The truth was, Narae just didn't mean as much to them as they meant to each other. Their dynamic was falling apart and only Narae really knew why.

In reality, Seokjin and Jimin were both maddeningly jealous. They'd known Narae was avoiding them at night. They had silently accepted that she didn't want to fall asleep with them, that she was avoiding sex with them, that she didn't want to be seen naked by them even. Now they learned that she preferred the company of others to their own. Over the years, they'd all grown used to being used as a pathway to other Bangtan members, and this situation felt similar to Jimin and to Seokjin. Narae wanted their younger, more talented, better looking members instead of them. This was all they could see.

Of course none of that was true. In fact, Narae had only been seeking solace in her other mates because she felt so disconnected from Jimin and Seokjin in the first place. It had been on Narae's mind a lot since New Year, that she had to take some kind of action to bring her bond with her soulmates back up to where it should be. To reverse the effects of the Hanahaki and ultimately to avoid her own death – a prospect which still seemed totally dramatic to her mind.

But like a serial over-eater, promising themselves that this week will be different, she simply never got around to making any clear effort to get better.

In the weeks that had followed her conversation with the Professor of Soul Studies based overseas, it had become commonplace for her to experience, and then ignore the symptoms of the disease. Narae was often in the bathroom, and often because she was in violent raptures of a coughing fit which ultimately brough up handfuls of dried bloody flakes. The headaches which had plagued her on and off were now mostly there, and were only being mildly subdued by the painkillers she was taking.

She ate like a bird too, just pecking at bits here and there, but mostly wrapping her hands around a large mug of hot water which she'd drink down hungrily for the warmth it provided. She was always cold these days.

Every now and again, it tugged at her mind that she needed to engage with what was happening to her, that she was a little more unwell than she had been the week before. But it never seemed like the right time to do anything about it. The boys were extremely busy lately, and they always had some event or another which needed their attention. She felt intensely embarrassed about what was happening to her, so facing it directly was out of the question. She needed to just improve the relationship with them all in some other way, starting with Seokjin and Jimin, who seemed to favour her less and less. Both had become a little unwell themselves over the last few weeks so Narae didn't want to disturb them too much.

Even since the night before, her mind had clouded a little more. The idea that her time with Taehyung and Jungkook and their combined scents would be cut down to nothing had broken another fragile threat binding her to her mates. She was losing them, and with them the ability to think properly was disappearing too. Okay, she decided. Time to really make some effort before she actually did get unwell.