Breathe You In Slip From My Grasp

Chapter 6

For a long moment, Eren didn't say a word. He wasn't even truly staring at Reiner, his head hanging low. His piercing eyes were hidden by his heavy set lids and hair, for that, Reiner was truly thankful. There were millions of questions building in his mind, too many things that he wanted to say, but he didn't have the words to ask.

All he could say was, "Tell me what you know."

Eren offered him no response, offered him no movement. Eren only sat there, a dead statue of a once dear friend. There was nothing, but there was also everything. The thick push of tension that dug deep into Reiner's shoulders, the burn of anger hot against his face. There was so much anger, so much unsaid hatred, it made Reiner feel as if he was suffocating. Choking on inflamed air, coughing out the bitter happenings of the past. His lungs were tight, beads of sweat sliding down his neck.

There was a part of him that was grateful for the silence, a sudden flood of relief passed through him, easing his tense shoulders. He was grateful for the fact that there was no answer. He could feel no hurt if there was only silence, he couldn't be told that the monster Eren had become was by his doing. He could hide from everything Eren might say. In the silence, Reiner could hide away from the pain of the truth.

But the silence doesn't last long, it never does.

"What is it that you want to know?" He muttered, his voice was raspy and unused. It burned against Reiner's ears, a screech that made him flinch. He could only sink further back into the bars of the cell. He hoped that he would be able to feel her warmth through them, but he couldn't, there was nothing but the stark freeze of cold metal.

Reiner didn't know where to start, which question to ask. He wanted to ask him everything, ask him why, ask him what. He wanted to know where it was that the world had begun to fall apart for them. He wanted to know how he got off the island. He wanted to hear the story, he needed to hear the story. Reiner wanted to hear Eren's voice brighten once more, the glare of his eyes to fall away, he wanted for everyone around him to reveal that this was just a joke. An elaborate gag that he was unaware of. They'd laugh at him, holding their stomachs. Sasha and Marco, Zofia and Udo would come for the shadows and throw their arms around him. The brightness of the light would return. He wanted.

He wanted.

He wanted.

He wanted.

He wanted to say sorry.

Instead, he just swallowed and shuddered out, "What are you planning?"

Eren breathed in, slow and steady. The air seemed to straighten his shoulders, lifting him within his chair. His head began to rise, sitting squarely upon his shoulders, "Survival."

One word. All Eren gave him was one word, he looked back at everyone standing behind him. They were glaring intently at him. Captain Levi stood right at the door, pale hands wrapped tightly around them. Reiner fears that the metal will snap at his hands. That his grip will overwhelm the strength of the steel.

"For who?" Reiner can't think straight. The words that leave him don't feel like his own. They feel like an imposter slinked into his body, breathed their air into his lungs, moved his mouth with their hands, and coerced the syllables to leave him. It felt odd as if he was hearing his voice from beyond his own body.

"Whoever deserves it."

The arrogance and the outright disregard for his actions made something within Reiner boil. Red hot anger flooded throughout his body, at Eren's words. So many people died, children, mothers, fathers. Innocent people, good people. They'd all died, for what? Because they didn't 'deserve it'?