You'll See

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More

and more

you push me towards the edge.

A sweet smile?

My smile?

That's all I'll allow you to see.

"She's so strong" they said

"What's wrong with you?" they said

But inside my head

Their words shattered the barrier...

holding back my misery.

The "fake" smile

you meant

Because that's what it is

a mask for your protection alone.

Yet still you called me "weird"

over so many years, Dear,

and now I'm bitter to the bone.

Everytime your words hurt

and slashed

through my mind,

to you I smiled so sweetly.

Keeping my Darkness at bay,

your comments instigated this pain

wounding me silently

and so deeply.

And my own fractured soul

I was trying to hold

together

fell apart in my hands

And more than the pain

the shock

the mundane

you yourself has made this way

completely insane

And I cannot stand your proud smile

absolutely inane.

This hate that I've festered

is calling your name

And one day,

one fateful day

I will finally crack

and this blood stained madness

I won't be able to hold back.

Oh that day.

That day!

This ravaged mind will be free!

You'll see behind my cryptic mask.

You'll see.

You'll all see.

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