invisible

one

Chapter one

September 13

It usually starts with simple greetings. The kind where you give each other genuine warm smiles and meaningful hello's. It was the kind where it just feels right with that person, like you were really bound to meet them. You don't judge them or anything, and in the end they leave you a good long lasting impression of them.

Those were the kind of greetings that rooted into relationships. Simple greetings with great impacts. Before you know it, that person would be such a big part of your life.

Deadly as it seems of course, because once that person leaves and the hello's are left with empty goodbye's, you're left with agonizing pain.

Except I was the runaway. I was the one who left. I was the one who caused the hurt on someone.

Caspar Samuels was the boy who I loved so dearly. He meant so much to me that I became scared of my own feelings. He became my thoughts and the sound of my heartbeat, and I was too afraid to admit it to myself that I've fallen really hard for someone because I didn't think any of it was real. Then I ran away and left him.

There were other reasons too why I left him. He was leaving soon to go to Europe. My parents didn't like him, his parents didn't like me. We fought too often the past few days.

Maybe Caspar and I were meant to be in love, but are never meant to be together. He became a part of my life for a moment, and I could never be more thankful for the blissful moments he had given me.

Detachment was the hardest part of it all. The farther away I got from him, the more painful it got. It was like slowly ripping off a bandaid, an excruciating pain.

Right now, as I stare at the periwinkle blank wall, there's an empty feeling in my chest. I've been crying ever since I got here and it's been three days. But now -right now- everything just feels empty and numb, i've even stopped crying this morning.

My sister understands the whole situation. She understands me. She didn't even judge me when I showed up on her doorstep unexpectedly with only a backpack. She quickly took me in and comforted me, she even told me that I could stay for as long as I want and that I could stay in the guest room.

"Hey, Are you alright?" I turned around and saw my sister leaning on the door frame. "Clearly not since I've been calling your name three times now." My sister told me. Then she came to me and sat on the edge of the bed where I am.
She moved a piece of my hair out of my face and looked at me. "You've always been scared of what you couldn't see." She said. "And now you're the one who doesn't want to be seen."

I only nodded my head and looked at her in the eye. I could see the concern she had for me and I feel grateful because I have someone like her.

I lay down on the bed, my feet dangling. I stared at the ceiling. "There's more to the story you know. I just don't know how i'm supposed to talk about it." I spoke.

She gave me a pat on the knee. "I know, and you don't have to tell me. But I am always here for you."

"Thank you Lucy." I tell her.

She gave me a sincere smile then she left the room and I was left with my thoughts again.