Not The Nanny Anymore (GirlxGirl)

Chapter Three

My hands are trembling, and I have to wipe them off on my pants the whole time in the car as I feel them get sweaty. My heart is beating so fast- too fast. And don't get me wrong, it's great that it is beating in the first place, but if it could calm down a bit, that would be nice... Unfortunately, it only seems to get worse, the closer we get to the airport. It has been a while since I've felt pure panic like this. The fogginess and additional ringing in my head are disturbing. It truly feels like I might faint if I get out of the car, and the hot temperature doesn't help.

"We're here", Gustave places his hand on my knee, and I flinch at the sudden touch.

I was so focused on not dying that I hadn't even seen the fences and the huge building with lots of airplanes waiting on the gigantic territory outside. The ringing in my ears deprived me of hearing some of the airplanes leaving or landing, but now that I seem to be a bit more conscious, or a bit more in the moment, I could hear them loud and clear.
Taking a deep breath, I get out of the passenger seat to walk up to the back of the car. Gustave grabs our stuff, and he hands me my things. Then, I follow him to where the others presumably are. He moves determinedly, and I have to quicken my pace to keep up with him. My breath hitches in my throat when I finally spot them as well, gradually getting closer, and the nervous butterflies flutter more heavily with every step that gets taken.

God, she is even more beautiful than I had anticipated. Her skin is a little more tanned; it appears smoother. Her eyes seem lighter; her hair softer, and her aura calmer than when I last saw her.

Those quick observations make me internally groan. Did that really have to be my first thought here? Did she really have to be the first person here to grab my attention? I feel myself getting a bit angry, or disappointed.
Maybe Bailee is a siren, or a vampire, who has the special power for everyone around them to view them as attractive just so they can lure their prey in and can fucking ruin them. Bailee definitely is like that as well. Even after everything that happened to her, my brain got fooled, and for a second I felt like I fell head over heels for her all over again.

Don't, Tess! Get a grip.

I know. I know. Sure, she is crazily beautiful, and she always has been, but I should not forget how she didn't hesitate to hurt me on the day before I left. The painful words she spoke were unnecessary. My brain has replayed those harsh words over and over, and I wasn't even sure whether she was lying or telling the truth back then, but if she really cared about me, as she claimed before, she would have never spoken those words. And that is a fact. I won't just forget and forgive. I don't want to be hateful towards her either. I want to be mature about this, as far as I can. But I obviously expect an apology from her, and then I'm fine and we can move on from this. But obsessing over her looks already is definitely going too far for now, so, yes, I should get a grip.

I inhale deeply, trying to breathe in new air in a desperate attempt to blow away the butterflies. Straightening my back, I pull my shoulders back slightly. That way, I try to make myself physically bigger, so that I psychologically feel more confident and the internal tension reduces. Gustave and I greet them generally, and together we all walk inside. Naturally, to make it easier for me to breathe, I try to stay as far away from Bailee as possible.

We stand in the queue for a while and eventually can check in. The people that work here weigh our luggage, and they take it with them, to load it onto the airplane soon. Afterwards, we walk through the security gates to the departure hall.
We've got some free time before going to the boarding gate. I suppose now is a good time to go to the toilet, having felt the need to do so basically all day. Even though, I have already gone three times today without having drunk anything, but for some reason, my bladder seems very sensitive today.