company. | jori

Nine: Stars

Jade

"Besides, I'm the one trying to get you to kiss me." I pick at a loose string on my hoodie nonchalantly and wait for Vega to pick something for us to watch. I run my tongue over my teeth and realize that if we're not going to eat anything more tonight I should brush now.

"Hey, do you want to eat anything while we watch whatever?" I turn to her to see her eyes already on me, staring. "Is there something on my face?" I bring my hands up to my lips and cheeks to check for pizza sauce or something.

"No, no. I just— I can't believe you just said that." Tori is truly dumbfounded and I can't help but snort.

"Well, it's true isn't it?" I ask her and gesture towards the laptop to get her to pick something to watch already. She sighs and goes back to scrolling through Netflix. My heart is abuzz in my chest, the flutter threatening to show in my face with rosy red cheeks, but I do everything I can to push it back.

Really, I have no idea why I said that. I just figured that if I treat it like it's not a big deal, then it won't be a big deal. It'll just be another fun thing we do. Her trying to get me to put on my seatbelt, me mocking her, grabbing each other by the wrists, and me trying to kiss her. Just one of those things...

—

"Do you have feelings for me?" Tori asks after we had settled in and gotten through 20 minutes of the movie.

"Do I— What?" I gawk at her. The nerve of this girl. I genuinely cannot believe she just asks that and thinks that's okay.

"I'm just wondering." Her voice drops and she crosses her arms in embarrassment.

"No, Vega, I don't have feelings for you." I sigh and reach over to pause the movie. When I look at her there's a small frown playing on her lips and I can't help the way my heart beats faster at the implications.

"I'm dating Beck," I say, really to remind myself more than to remind her, "Besides, how could I even know if I like you when we've never kissed?"

"You don't have to kiss somebody to know you like them." Tori ripostes.

"That's how I found out I liked Beck."

"Well how are you sure you actually like Beck and you don't just like the way he kisses you?"

I stare at her and bite my lip in thought. It's a ballsy thing to say, and a completely left field accusation, but I suppose it's something I have pondered before. Wondering if I was confusing relief of physical comfort for genuine love. Especially whenever Beck is away because I find myself missing his touch more than anything else about him.

"Sorry. Maybe I shouldn't have—"

"Let's get drunk." I cut her off and hop off my bed, extending my hand to her so I can pull her up and to the kitchen to grab whatever alcohol we have lying around.  When we get there we're greeted by Jack and Oliver at the table already pouring shots.

"Those better be for us." I warn them, glaring at Jack.

"Oh come on, Jade. You drink, why can't we? Your mom isn't home." Oliver rolls his eyes.