#We Want To Do The Talking

Not all equal

"Ouch!" The young girl exclaimed.

"Aba what are you doing, give me that"

Aba was a 7-year-old girl, born to the village chief Nassor and his wife Nayo. She had a brother - a twin - named Ade. They had practically grown up together, and yet there was a visible difference.

"How many times do I have to teach you" his mother continued. "Wet your hand before turning the bread."

"I tried doing that. But it was still hot" Aba argued

"Uh uh uh. None of those excuses, in a while you are going to have to take care of the house, both Baba and I are getting old. Now try again."

"Like This?"

"Yes. Well done" When Baba comes home you can surprise him.

The house they lived in wasn't all too big but was the biggest in the entire village. It had sturdy cay walls and a hay roof covering. On the outside, were beautiful traditional art designs. Aba remembered painting a corner of the house with her brother, not too long ago, back then they didn't seem so different.

She put the food in the respective stainless-steel containers and brought them out of the kitchen. They mainly had 2 rooms, the kitchen and the living area. They sleep wherever t was comfortable, and that changed depending on the weather. Her father came in at around 7:30 that evening. It had been 2 months since Ade, and Aba has last seen their father. Only the previous morning, did they receive a telegram saying that he was on route. He looked exhausted.

He stood in the doorway and said "I have some good news. The project is almost done. These last few weeks have been difficult but we managed to complete the school. We may be able to start taking admission soon." He was very proud of his accomplishments, and that feeling was reciprocated by his mother. "Oh finally, Ade can go to school." She said.

Aba had known. She knew that she wasn't going to go to school. That was the norm. About 6 months ago, a young man from the city had come. He claimed to be a teacher and was looking to start a school in the outskirts of the village. He was leanly built, with big rimmed glasses, and overgrown curly hair. Aba once thought that if he cleaned up his appearance he might actually look handsome, but she had kept that thought to herself, for it wasn't commonplace for a seven-year-old to think like that. That being said, she always did have a slight edge, when it came to intellect, over other children her age, and so not going to school did feel odd at first, but she came to accept it.

Her father washed his hands and sat down with the rest of the family. They were seated in a diamond pattern. Her father, sat facing the doorway, prepared to meet someone if they required an audience with the chief. Aba and Ade sat on either side of him, and the mother sat opposite. "Aba helped with the chapatis today." Her mother pointed out. "Oh really" Her father replied, impressed. He kissed his daughter's forehead and ruffled her hair. "She'll make an excellent wife one day. Work hard and one day you'll be as good as your mum." Aba felt proud but also a little hurt, that the expectation set for her, was one of a wife and nothing more.

The next few weeks were equally as busy for her father, but not so much at home. Her mother bought fabric and began stitching my brother's outfit for when he started school. They did, however, have a surprise visit. The teacher, Mr Sabiti, had visited them. It had turned out, that Aba's father had left the sheet with the list of names of those enrolled back in the village. On a trip to retrieve them, Aba had quite an interesting conversation.

"Hello, young lady." Mr Sabiti began. Aba was working on polishing her brother's shoes, with her back towards the door.

Startled by the sudden voice. Aba quickly got up, dropping the polish. She bent slightly as to welcome the man. She then knelt down to clean up the mess she had made.

"Allow me to help." The teacher bent down, along with Aba to pick up the polish. "I don't see your shoes. Will you not be joining us."

"Join You?" Aba replied. "Ade is going to school. Baba says I need to learn how to be a good house maker."

"Is that so? Do you want to go to school?"

"I don't know. I always thought that I might like it, but are girls even allowed?"

"They are absolutely allowed. That being said a lot of your friends won't be coming to school. If you still think you want to come just let me know. I'll arrange something with Nassor." He said. 

At that moment, at the sound of conversation, Aba and Ade's mother came out of the kitchen. She shooed Aba away and welcomed the teacher into the house. Aba couldn't hear what they were saying, but even if she could she wasn't going to say anything. It wasn't as if her parents didn't love her, or that they had forced her into learning about household duties. They simply had never considered sending their daughter to school. She did not know how they would react to her proclamation. But at the end of the day, if Mr Sabiti, stayed true to his word, all she needed to do was to decide if she wanted to go.

She peeped through the doorway and saw her mother searching through her father's drawers, as Mr Sabiti stood outside patiently. As if he could feel her looking at him, and gestured as if asking if she had an answer. She thought about it again. This was her future, and at the end of the day it was her choice, but she also didn't know how her family were to react. Considering all of that, she gave him a thumbs up. He gave her a smile and gave her a thumbs-up as well. Not going to lie, she felt happy.

This is perhaps the most common form of gender discrimination. It starts early within children, where their parents, often unbeknownst to them, reinforce the same stereotype until it becomes too late.

#WeWantToDoTheTalking