I Don't Tell You Enough

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Demon Vee

It was already midday but the angel hasn't left his room yet

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It was already midday but the angel hasn't left his room yet.

And I am starving.

But the bigger issue here is why I am still not leaving this literally God forsaken place after getting myself freed for hours now. I am even standing here outside of his room, having this inner battle inside my head whether I should knock or not when what I should be doing is to run away from this place before that angel changes his mind.

Why does it bother me seeing that pained expression on that pretty face of that angel? Why is this stupid organ inside my chest feels like burning everytime that face of his turns sad?

I admit I wasn't lying about having those dreams about that angel. It's mainly the reason why I infiltrated this grade A security system of his house. I want answers. It's the only way I could get his attention. If I have chosen another method of meeting him, I am afraid that with his reputation, he would have decapitated me first before I could even tell him about those dreams.

This all turned out as exactly as I have planned. The plan goes in showing him the birthmark, gets his reaction, hear the truth, annoy him with my rejection, and be gone with it. Somehow I know that if I'm really someone important from his past, then he would easily let me go. The gamble was on the part where I wasn't sure if I'm the lover or the nemesis. But since the dilema had passed already, I am free to go and leave this forsaken angel into his desolation.

I don't believe in reincarnation or the transmigration of the souls. Maybe it's happening or whatever but I believe that death is the end of a book and if ever we are reborn, we become a brand new us and capable of freeing ourselves from our past lives. That's why death is created because of that sole purpose. We are given the chance to reform our lives, renew, and forget about the painful experiences, and start anew.

The love story between the Angel Masa and this demon Yin from centuries ago was a pure tragedy, a divine paradox, a catastrophe in which anyone could guess how it would end. When I started suspecting anout my origins, I wasn't really bothered about my heart because the longing for this person was never there. He appeared at my dreams and that's just it. No lingering feelings of love and longing. But then I wanted to prove I'm already safe from this star-strewn lovers destiny bullshit. I'm afraid that if I see this angel in person, all this supposedly burried emotions would explode. It didn't happen though, and I was happy. This means that I would be able to evade our fate. I don't care if he had waited for centuries for my return, the me now doesn't love him or whatever. He can go live alove like a hermit crab fronthe reat of eternity.

"Ugh." There it is again, my heart is burning. It's so painful that my eyes becomes all blurry everytime it happens. It's just like what happened this morning. But what did I do? I only thought of the angel living a lonely life for..."Aaah! Ouch!" Fuck! It hurts! Thinking about it hurts my heart so bad. What is happening to me?

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