Dipper: *scared*Why would you think any if this was a good idea?
Phoenix: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence
Dipper: ......................
Phoenix: I don't know how you keep forgetting this.
____________________________________________Siren: I am going to need you to swear-
Loverboy: Fuck
Siren: .............
Siren: ....... swear as in promise
____________________________________________Dipper: I wanna die
Seven: We all do, you aren't special !
____________________________________________Fern: How do you want your coffee?
Misty: Black, like my soul
Fern: ................
Fern: Misty, your soul is a latte
____________________________________________Bernie: What the fuck is wrong with you?!?!
Kai: What? No good morning
Bernie: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you??
____________________________________________Nevaeh: Wolfgang, what is the ONE thing I asked you NOT to do tonight?
Wolfgang: Raise the dead
Nevaeh: And what did you do?
Wolfgang: Raise the dead
____________________________________________Safara: I still have no idea how I'm attracted to you
Kai: Yeah, well, you're stuck with me, and no take backs, honey.
____________________________________________Dynamite: Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff
Orlando: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!!!!
____________________________________________Phoenix: I have an idea.
Misty: A good idea?
Phoenix: Let's not get ahead of ourselves
____________________________________________Fern: Uptown Funk would've made it into the Shrek Soundtrack
Kingston: That's the truest statement I've ever heard
____________________________________________Misty: Truth or dare?
Dipper: Truth
Misty: How many hours have you slept this week?
Dipper: ..............
Dipper: Dare
Misty: Go to sleep
Dipper: I don't like this game
____________________________________________Aster: Are you mad??
Wylie: No
Aster: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?
____________________________________________Nevaeh: Wolfgang, no
Wolfgang: Wolfgang, yes
____________________________________________Loverboy: Do you guys hear something?
Kai: I hear the sound of you shutting the fuck up
____________________________________________Kingston : Hey, wanna hear a joke?
Orlando: I only like dark humor
Kingston, turning the lights off: What do you call a fake noodle?
Orlando : ...............
Kingston: An IMPASTA
____________________________________________Kidnapper: We have your child
Safara: I don't have a child?
Kidnapper: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?
Safara: Oh God, you have Misty!!!
I hope you enjoy it -glitched-ace-
YOU ARE READING
Alter ego oneshots and headcanons
RandomUpcoming Wednesday, It's the finale of Alter ego Season 1. I enjoy the show so I decided to make this book. Please request in the 1st part plz.