Messing with my head

Spying

After I came home from Nathalie, I'm deciding that I'm going to have a chill day without any other things I have to do. (I am obsessed with fast and furious so yk what I'm about to watch) hehe. I watch a marathon of all fast and furious movies. After a few hours. I am hungry. Let's order some pizza. Hell yes.
After waiting for half an hour I hear the doorbell. Pizza time.

Pov jason
That girl. I can't keep my mind of her. How her body moved at the beat of the song back then at the party. My dick was about to explode. Her dress looked so fucking hot. I would love to rip that of her body. She was a goddess. Hot as fuck. I wanted to fuck her till she can't walk anymore.
Maybe sometime.
I'm laying in bed thinking about shit, I have killed 4 men today. I think about the ways I have slid they're troat. And then desperately asking for help. But they knew nobody would help then because of how shitty they acted.
Tomorrow I have to be at another place to kill a guy. I was thinking how, but then I got interrupted.
"Heyyyyy jason"
Fuck, Veronica. The fucking slut.
I have fucked her multiple times, but she kept screaming like a stupid sirene of a police car.
So I stopped that. But she keeps asking. Weird motherfucker.
Veronica, whats wrong?. I sounded annoyed. I was. "Well I couldn't stop thinking about you, so I thought you could fuck me against the wall." She says biting her lip. Sure. Did I say sure, yes I did I have my needs. And I can't sleep right now so fuck it.
"That was so good, Jason" her sweaty hand was laying on my stomach. Well, you can go now. "But, but," No buts. get the fuck out.
She runs out of my room, crying. I'm not even sorry. I know I'm a man without feelings everyone thinks that. It's because my father abused me when I was younger. And I did not have an lovely past. I did not talk about it as often, or ever. Cause I feel anger building up everywhere.

Pov Adora
I wake up from the sun in my face, mmm I love Saturdays. I walk into the bathroom fixing my morning hair and Breath, by brushing my teeth. And hair. I have to go to the supermarket for some grocery's. I love buying food, trying new recepies. Tasting new stuff. I stand in front of my closet looking for something to wear. Grey sweatpants and a black hoodie, my Nike airforces and done.

Im walking, cause it's 5 minutes away from my house, it's always so cold inside, I shiver. First, alcohol. I eat healthy I promise but I just love beer, and All that shit. It makes me feel good. After that. Vegetables, mmm, after a few thing my whole bag is full, after paying I'm walking outside and I see a black Porsche. Mannnnn I love cars, it's mat black, big, low and makes a lot of sound. I see a man coming out of a building. Looking around, that's? Huh, that's that guy again, he's running down that stairs, and opens the door of the car. Im running to the car, out of breath. Hey, your that guy right, from yesterday. What's your name. "Jason" okay. What are you doing here. He looks around. Like he's scared of something. What wrong?
"Nothing, I need to go" oka- he cuts me off

- That night-
I grab a beer from the fridge, I grab my book, and start reading. I asked Nathalie to do something but she couldn't. So now I'm alone with my beer. :)

Short chapter, sorry <3 not so much inspiration

we are going to write further anyway.

its monday again. the fucking stupidst week starts again.

i walk to the bathroom and take a shower, that moment with that guy was very weird. i normally not hook up with a random man at a party, but it was a good night tho... i look in the mirror and grab my daycream. i blowdry my hair and put on The neighbourhood. i love music, making breakfast, dancing with the music, singing. worryless right. nah. my head is full with thoughts about my future, finding a job, trying to not think about mom. dad is going to visit today. i love him, and im glad that he can visit me, because i have not seen him in 2 months. hes always busy. with work. i always tell him to take a day of because he works 24-7 but he doesnt listen. its his problem.

breakfast is eggs on toast. i dont have the motivation to put effort in it. i change into my work out set, my hair in a ponytail. i love to exercise i feel alot happier after. i just do yoga cause i dont want to sweat with the fact that i showered before breakfast, i try to push all my stupid thoughts about me fucking that man away. but im horny. i need alcohol. i grab some wodka from a shelf and. close my eyes. i need to do something with my life man. i open my laptop and search from jobs, all stupid things that i dont like, i'll just try some out and then see. i type some emails, and then sent them. done. now we just wait.

i call Nathalie, ''hey do you want to come over and watch euphoria, im bored'' yes, sure i'll be there in a few minutes,'' i grab some comfy sweatpants and a sweater. i would say i have a good taste in clothing but the problem is i have nowhere to go. so i dont have to dress up. after a few minutes nathalie is there, ''heyyy'' ''hey, adora'' i grab a blanket and we make ourselfves comfortable. i start it, after 2 hours of discussing whats gonna happen. i ask a question. ''should we order food'' ''hell yes, i want kfc.'' ''you're reading my mind babe''. after eating a whole bucket and 2 large fries. we are full as fuck. we spent the night talking about random shit, while drinking some shots, and getting a little bit drunk. ''hahahaha, you're ssooooo dumbbb Naaathalie.'' adora, you should stop drinking,'' ''nah, i feel sober man'' ''yeah sure'' i like, being drunk, not drunk like throwing up, and feeling sick but. like drunk as in forgetting what i feel, what i think. all my worries are in the back of my head at that moment, i just feel happy, empty too, but just. i know its bad and i need to stop, obsessing about drinking, i need to find my happiness in something else.

the next morning

i wake up not remembering last night, just a unclear thought of Nathalie rolling me into the bed. i feel like a mess. i should have not let the alcohol get the power over myself, and letting nathalie responsible for me. im a bad friend, im a shitty motherfucker. i start crying, why do i live in this world when nobody even cares about me. maybe they do but, why do they not understand im not alone but still lonely. if that makes sense. i grab my phone, i see a text of dad. ''hey sweetie, im sorry i didnt visit yesterday, busy. sorry, love you bye'' really, i did forget about him yesterday but still, he has one fucking daughter. and he hasnt seen her for 2 months and he still is to busy, you know fuck him. i can live by myself. okay i already do but. it was me and my dad. and now its me. independent woman. i laugh but cry at the same time, no im not.

yes, yes, next chapter. im sorry about writing so slow. im just very busy with school and stuff.

what do you guys think about the book we were liars. btw cause idk. i did read it and i cried, cause i felt confused and sad. but my friend thinks its boring. and tiktok has very different comments about it.