Blindly In Love (Sanders Sides LAMP fic)

Chapter 11: A Blind Date

Hey, hey everyone! Welcome back. This chapter has several themes and references to anxiety, losing people you care about, mutual awkwardness. I think that is it for warnings, please correct me if I am wrong. As always, take care of yourselves, thank you for reading and have a wonderful day.

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Drip, drip, drip... Drip, drip, drip...

Virgil groaned as he woke up to the sound of his phone going off. He didn't even bother opening his eyes to avoid any issues with light sensitivity. He groped around the edge of his bed to grab his phone. He commanded his voice app to answer the call and put it up to his ear.

"Mnn, hello?" Virgil yawned.

"Oh hey Kiddo, did I wake you up?" Patton asked from the other end of the line.

"Nah, it's fine. What's up Patt?" Virgil inquired, doing his best to sound awake.

"I wanted to see if maybe you wanted to go out with me to the mall today," Patton replied.

"Yeah, sure, I'm always up for hanging out with you three," Virgil replied, letting out a bit of a tired groan as he sat up in bed.

"I actually just meant you and me, if you want to that is," Patton corrected nervously.

"O-oh! J-just us? Alone?" Virgil clarified panickedly, much louder than he intended to.

"Shut up, 'm tryin' to sleep" Remy grumbled, chucking a small stuffed coffee cup across the room to hit Virgil's leg.

"Sorry Rem! I, um, I'm up for just going out with you today. I mean hanging out. Um, I'll see you then I guess. Wait, I mean where and when? Sorry I almost forgot to get those details. Heh, guess I'm tired," Virgil rambled nervously.

"Hahaha, I'll walk over in a little bit and meet with you at your dorm. What do you think about meeting in twenty minutes?" Patton asked with a soft chuckle.

"Y-yeah, that'll be great Patt. I'll see you then," Virgil replied with a soft smile.

"Bye kiddo, see you in a bit!" Patton chirped cheerfully before ending the call.

Virgil let out a happy sigh as he fell back into his bed. Him and Patton alone, it couldn't get any better than that. It wasn't like it was a date but still, he could have one day to monopolize Patton's time and pretend for just a second he had a chance with him.

Anxiety welled up in his throat as he thought about it for a moment. He really wanted it to go well but there was so much that could go wrong. Patton could become upset with the fact Virgil couldn't do all the same things Patton could. Virgil could do something stupid to draw everyone's attention at the mall and cause troubles for him. He could accidentally be too honest with his feelings and make Patton uncomfortable or even make him and the rest of his soulmates hate him forever.

"Remy you've gotta help me!" Virgil complained, covering his heated cheeks with his hands in an attempt to hide himself from his own internal humiliation.

"But 'm sleeping," Remy mumbled into his pillows.

"It's past time your narcoleptic ass should be up anyways. I'm having an anxious gay problem and you're the only person I know who can fix it," Virgil snapped.

"You just up too, Brat," Remy groaned, his bed creaking as he sat up. "But fine, I'm up. What's the issue?"

"Patton invited me on a.. Well not date, but one on one hang out situation thing and I have no idea what I'm doing. Should I call and cancel and just say I'm sick? I'm gonna mess everything up if I go. He's gonna realize how boring it is to be around a blind person. Or I'm gonna let on to my feelings. Or I'll embarrass him somehow... And if I do then he won't want to even be my friend anymore and I'll lose him again and it'll be high school all over again. I don't want to go through that again. I may have chosen to do it the first time but it hurt so much. I don't even know why it hurt that much. I lost Janus before in my life and I felt so heartbroken but it was nothing like Patton, is that really just what a crush feels like? I can't stand the thought of not seeing him and being around him, it's like some kind of fucking drug. And Logan is so amazing too, I've got such strong feelings for him, I'm afraid of losing him too now. I just met him. Heaven forbid I get attached to that over dramatic prince next. Uhg, I'm gonna ruin our friendship because my stupid emotions want to be fucking selfish when I know perfectly well I don't have a chance with them and even if I did I couldn't be with them because I'm too terrified of my parents figuring it out, you know like an idiot."