☾ explanation ☽
before you start to read when she was mine, sorry about this little one shot, because is not good, or probably because I'll have a few -a lot- of bad grammar but English is not my native language, sorry about that, i'll try my best, and i do this more for fun by the way this one shot is for the story decisions by durmsteiger contest, and to be honest i was planning made this one shot about Rowan and Mario Götze or Sven Bender but Mario only appear in the story a little and Sven didn't appear so... here i am making the one shot with Erik by the way i'll be quoting a few songs of lawson because they're cool and they inspired me for write this one shot.
chapter one:
"Is not easy right?" Sven was next to me watching how Rowan was making out in front of us with her boyfriend Toni, i can say yeah is not easy watch the girl you like stay with another man, who is actually making her happy, she was giving that pretty smiles that should be for me, that should be me, and not Toni, but i guess i need to move on and forget our story leaving behind me.
"No is not easy" i said finally after i'm done with that scene i mean who want to see how Rowan is almost having sex with Toni in the middle of the club? not me obviously but i guess I'm a masochist. "Is this will be more easy with the pass of the time?"
"Bro I going to be honest, this will never be easy, I had an opportunity with Rowan and I haven't get over" yeah sucks for me the fact the girl I love has been sleeping with my team mattes, or sort of most of the people probably will call Rowan slut but she is not a slut, she just like to take the opportunities that life gives her to make it out with someone, and if she will be a boy no one judge her, so i'm not the right person to do that.
"Sven the only thing you want is a booty call with Rowan, Dummkopf, and I only want to be the one who makes her happy, the one who knows She will go with him at the end of the day, you know? take her on a dates, make special things for her like make a breakfast and take it to bed, that kind of things i want to do with Rowan but i will never do, because she's taken" just sometimes i'm just too tired of trying over and over, and get nothing. Everywhere I go, everything I do remind me of Rowan, even just a picture on the wall, I'm surrounded by it all, I'm wrapped around her finger. Always I wonder where she goes, wonder what she's doing, will I ever know but... when she was mine, everything was easy, i haven't need to worry what she was doing, where she was, if she's okay and that stuff, everything was simple and never felt so good, when she was mine, I wanted to remember never missed a second, now I wish I could forget, forget when she was mine.
Thinking about when I last saw her. I know she's not to far away, even when i close my eyes and I still see Rowan, not easy. "I just need to get out of here" I say too loudly and make my way outside the club, I need my time alone and think about this, how sick am i for being in love. She's not even mine and i'm like an idiot loving here while She's someone else's angel. My heart is racing even when i think in Rowan. If I close my eyes just for a second, I can see her smile, I can hear the laugh I love and I can't get enough, I can stop the world with only just her kiss.
Rowan freaking Müller what have you done with me?
"Erik? what are you doing here?" I heard her voice. "Are you okay?
"I can make the same question, what are you doing here? you don't have any thing more important to do? like stop being everything that i could ever think, because you always live in my mind, because You are the first thing that comes to my mind when I wake up and the last person I think before going to sleep. I just want to stop with this because i'm in love with you, and I'm living in the hell because my life without you sucks, a lot, i use to have plans, for us, and now what i have? nothing, well maybe only memories, but i wish i could forget, forget when you was mine, or wake up with amnesia and forget about that little things, like our last kiss, the way you looked at me when you said to me i love you, and now that i'm decided to forget all you just came here and ask me if i'm okay? because no i'm not, so... can I ask for a simple favor? don't talk to me ever again, because that makes me feel like i'm important to you, like if i have a chance that obviously is not, i want to be happy, i want to be loved and not just being the one who gives everything in the relationship and get nothing back, this probably would be difficult, i want to be happy with someone else, like you did with Toni" finally I can have all that off my chest, and after this i start to walk to my car, i need to drive away from here, maybe take a few days off the work, and visit Greece or Italy, and forget all the drama that I have had in Germany.
6 months later.
I was in an interview quiet nervous, because finally I am going to announce something important about my life, and i want to share this with all the fans, and not keep this in secret, i'm not like other football players that like to keep in touch with fans and tweet their hole life,I prefer have that kind of things in my private life, it pass a long time since I saw Müller and his sister, and now they are here in the interview and makes me feel a little more nervous.
"So... what's going on in your life lately?" Thomas asks and i look down little shy.
"I have a girlfriend since recently" and the audience says «awww» even Rowan who looks kinda shock, I met Circe in Mykonos, we started to date like two months ago and then i decided she was the one for have a new start.
