Bakugou x male reader { Hiatus}

4

//self harm warning

Waking up all I saw in my vision was the time, 12;46 am was lit up in a neon lime green colour , I squinted my eyes from how bright it was and then rolled to the other side. I lifted my pillow half above my head and it just barely covered my ears. I accidentally fell asleep, I'm glad that I'm awake now. I don't ever want to go to sleep . I don't want to deal with that.
Most nights that I fell asleep for more than and hour I'd be paralysed when I woke up, while these demons roamed my room. Tormenting me. I was always scared shitless when it happened, so I planned my sleep, 1 hour or less, no more or it will happen again. That's the rule. I felt my body struggle to move while my eyes were closed, I tried breaking free, shoving my eyes open, jolting my body forwards to sit. Sitting will keep me awake, my room was dark.

"Damn it, she turned my light off again" I got up to turn it on, as well as my room light, now it was completely bright. Darkness makes my eyes see things, things that bring me terror. My mother knows I hate my light turned off, yet she still does it.

"How long was I asleep, 3;10, I left at uhhh, 3; 50,, damn, I got lucky. 4;00 - 12;46, ,,, 8 hours. How the fuck did I sleep 8 hours without it happening. Phew, oh right if I was asleep for even 5 more minutes I have no doubt in my mind that it would happen, I really dodged a fucking bullet." I was breathing heavily and just noticed, I rocked back and fourth a little bit. I grabbed my phone that was sat next to me and I was about to do what I usually do then I noticed blondey texted me.

You; hello :)

Blondey ; what's up?

Shit now I feel bad I never responded, I'm supposed to be there. I highly doubt he'd be awake at this time, it can't hurt to text him though,

You; nothing, apologies for the late reply, how are you doing?

I always wonder if my texting is dry or not. My old friends always said so. I remember exactly as it happened.

"You know your texting is really dry" friend called out

"Oh is it? I'm sorry" apologies always make my words feel softer, I thought so at least. No one called me out on it though.

"Yea, it's annoying, it's why no one texts you anymore, honestly I don't know what happened to you, we used to text so much, you were actually fun to talk to and now you're like- blehh" they averted their eyes to their friend as i sigh and silently walk away. No one really cares do they?

"Hah, I went off the whole day wondering about it... actually that was years ago I still think and continue to worry about it now" all I had been doing was day dreaming, or more so remembering, of all the 'red flags' my friends had at the time, glancing to my phone from time to time breaking back to reality. I looked around as everything went dark, blink and it's back to normal, growing black again, blinking stopped my vision going black, then it goes blurry. It lasts a few minutes than goes back to normal. noticing back at my phone, read 3;44 ugh. I got up and got ready, there was nothing really else to do anyway. I managed to bring myself out of bed, I layed my uniform out, and walked to the bathroom, the shower barely lasted 6 minutes before becoming a burning cold. Sometimes I stayed purposely to feel that burn, it was interesting. It hurt but I never recognise it as pain so I laugh when I feel it because it's a nice but weird feeling.

"I should try to hide the fact I get no sleep, it just causes me problems to see people being concerned about me" I mentioned to myself as I pull my the bottom of my eye down in front of the mirror. I walk back to my room and put my uniform on. The next few hours I looked through my phone. I was so focused in what I was reading I didn't notice my mum walking to my room.

"I swear if you're not up now I'm going to kill y-" again, mothers sentence was cut off when she saw me.

"Good" she walked away, 'shutting' the door. She shut it but it was still open. I walked up with a big sigh and pushed it shut.