The Girl Next Door (AOT/SNK ~ Eremin Fanfiction)

Chapter 25 ~ jfc ern stop bein a pussy and fk ur gay bf ty

I couldnt think of a title so

also, thats what armins hair looks like jfc my ovaries just exploded bye @ life

---

Eren POV

It had been a whole month since Armin left, and it was the most painful month of my life.

Not that I cared.

I stopped caring for myself at all after that. I vowed to stop being selfish. I hardly ate, hardly slept, and I had no friends anymore. Everyone thought I was a jerk, and even when Mikasa tried to talk to me at home I just waved her off so she wouldn't have to talk to someone like me and waste her time. Grisha was still living with us, but I still didn't trust him for a second. I hardly spoke to anyone anymore, mostly because I was scared I would say something rude and hurt their feelings.

I could make an effort to make my life better, but I don't want to. I had been so selfish and rude in the past, that I decided I needed to know what it felt like to think about others, whilst not caring for myself at all. Although it wasn't all that pleasant, I didn't care, because everytime I walked past the old table and I see everyone sitting there, laughing and being happy. It made me happy to see they were happy. That was all that mattered.

I got home one afternoon, exhausted from school. When you didn't have friends to mess around with in class, you were actually forced to do the work. I never knew that school work could be so tiring. I walked upstairs to my room and shut the door behind me, throwing my bag down and yawning. I turned around and saw Mikasa sitting on my bed.

"S-Sorry." I mumbled, opening the door again so she could get out.

"I want to talk to you." She said, crossing her arms.

"You don't have to." I sighed.

"It'll make me happy if you do." She smiled.

I looked at her weirdly. That smile seemed suspicious, but then again, I guess if it made her happy I would do it.

"Okay." I said, closing the door. Before I knew what was happening she grabbed me by the shoulders and looked into my eyes. I looked at her plainly.

"W-What?" I asked. Then she slapped me right across the face.

Hard.

I didn't react, and instead just stood there still looking at her blankly.

"What is wrong with you..." She asked quietly, hurt flashed through her eyes.

"W-What's wrong?" I asked quickly, seeing her getting upset.

"You need to stop, right now. Bring back my brother! What happened to you, Eren?" She asked, still looking at me sadly.

"Nothing..." I murmered. She took me to my bed and sat me down, then sat beside me.

"Ever since Armin left, you've just been an emotionless pile of shit. You don't eat, I'm sure you don't sleep, and you always sit alone! You've even been doing school work for once, so something must really be wrong." She chuckled lightly. "Why are you like this, Eren?"

I looked at her painfully, not knowing what to say. I don't want to talk to her about my feelings, that would just make me feel selfish. But then again... By not telling her, that would make me selfish anyway because she wants to know and I'm not telling her.

This emotion stuff was so hard to understand.

"I just... I just don't want to be a selfish jerk anymore. I want to put other's feelings first and completely disreguard my own. If others are happy, then I'm happy. I don't need anymore than that." I smiled.