PJO Winter One Shot Stories

7. A Godly Christmas

By SkysTheLimit084
Christmas With The Greek Gods

Hermes's POV

I sat nervously on my throne. The gray rock seat was not as comfortable as it normally was. This was the most important day of the year. All eleven gods plus Hestia waited not so patiently for Zeus to arrive.
Poseidon and Athena were having a heated staring contest. While Dionysus found pleasure in poking Ares in the back with vines then looking as innocent as possible when he turned around. Ares as thick headed as he was didn't suspect a thing.

Normally I would also be doing something. Like helping Apollo tease Artemis or trying to pick-pocket Hephaestus and steal his newest gadget. Hey a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. And this man needs his cool gadgets. The reason why I wasn't doing anything fun was because I was nervous as heck. This day could decide how my Christmas was going to go.

About five minutes later Zeus strolled in all proud and tall like he wasn't thirty minutes late to the meeting. We don't have many meetings so when we do it's annoying when people are late.

He sat down with a thump. Okay who gave Zeus more skittles? The dude is obsessed with skittles. And it's starting to show. I need to get the guy a gym membership.

There was awkward silence in the room. Everyone stopped talking. Even Athena had to break the staring contest with Poseidon to look at Zeus. Poseidon was doing a small victory dance on his throne. It mostly consisted of him sticking his tongue out at Athena and wiggling his eyebrows.

"You all know why you are gathered here today." He looked at all of us. One by one. The room was still awkward. "If it were not this important I wouldn't have bothered all of you, but today is the picking of Secret Santa names."

Let me rewind a little so you understand what's going on. Once upon a time there lived a very intelligent man. One day he was thinking really hard and he came up with this magnificent idea. He called this idea Secret Santa. This is his so very clever idea:

Basically you put everyone's name in a hat. Everyone then blindly chooses a name. They then have to buy this person a christmas gift, but the person you have to buy a present for isn't allowed to know that you're the one that pulled their name. On Christmas day every gift is placed under the christmas tree secretly so no one knows who bought them their present. Don't worry, that man is now living happily in Elysium. Getting the life he deserves.

Now let me tell you why this is such a big deal. We take Secret Santa seriously here on Olympus. Every year people try to bribe each other into telling them whose name they drew from the hat. So when presents are actually exchanged people know who gave them their gift. Then they get mad because it's not what they wanted. Both world wars were caused by Secret Santa. So I hope I get someone like Artemis who doesn't care what she gets or Ares. All you need to do is skin a couple of mortals and gift them their flesh. He'll love you forever.

"Hestia, here is the hat. Everyone no peeking when you reach in." The hat was this old Santa hat that smelled like rotting cheese but no matter how often Hera begged them to wash it we gods are just way too lazy.
Hestia looked like she was trying not to gag when she took the hat from Zeus. She picked it up and carried it to Poseidon who was first. But right before Poseidon could reach his hand in, a chariot bursted into the throne room.

Two skeleton horses pulled a black obsidian chariot. On it was none other than good old death beard himself. Hades.

"You weren't about to start Secret Santa without me, right brother?" Hades stepped off his chariot and it disappeared. "Because that would break my fragile old heart." He laughed and flopped down on the floor to the left of Zeus. Zeus looked down at him with a fury in his eyes. "Now we can begin!"