Moon Lovers | Taejin ✓

Chapter 54: SCARRED

Seokjin's P.O.V.

Three days. Soldier Tak said that the revolution will be in three days. Therefore, I have to get my job done in three days.

While I'm thinking deep whether I'm doing the right thing or not, I sighed as I stare at my children. I know they wouldn't understand everything yet right now. But somehow, I hope someday they will. And hope that they'll forgive me for betraying the King, their father.

I have once imagined life to be happy and grand with Yoongi, thinking that he loves me and seeing my children adore him. But no, what he feels for me isn't love. He treated me like a slave and looked at me as if I am a possession he has all the control over.

I slowly took a sip of my herbal tea. It is the same birth control medicine I have been taking. Hence, Yoongi's evil action towards me wouldn't bring any fruit for sure.

Also, it did not give the Baekje King's plan a success. He wanted to use me against Yoongi. Causing Tae to do those things just to get me pregnant. But I was right, we made love. It was love that I felt with him all along.

Taehyung had a chance to treat me like an unworthy thing too. But he didn't. Because he loves me. Taehyung does. He always had. And now I know I shouldn't doubt that.

A whisper thru the door disturbed my thoughts. I inhaled deep and stood up to follow it.

'Wangbi, the King wishes to see you in his room.'

*******

"Jeonha, you wanted to see me?" I asked Yoongi, he is fixing his sleeping robe when I came in.

"Yea, Seokjin. Sleep here with me."

I gulped at what he said. But I already expected it. I can feel he is a bit suspicious of me. Might be because of how I reacted when I first saw Tae tied and beaten up badly.

Therefore, I knew he would want to test my loyalty right now. How ironic. He should be the one making it up to me after what he's done. But I need to gain his trust. So I can properly execute my part.

I nodded and walked into his mattress where he now lies. I was trying to calm my mind, but lying next to him just reminds me of the horrible experience I had with him.

"Don't you look beautiful, rather lovely, in your pink robe.." Yoongi whispered as he turned to me.

I didn't mean to, but I gasped loud when I felt his arms snaking at my waist. "Y-yoongi--"

"Why, Seokjin? I only want to feel your love for me. Prove to me that the General doesn't own your heart anymore."

I couldn't control my tears as they streamed down my cheeks. I couldn't move, and I don't know why.

"F-forgive me, Jeonha. It's just that-- what happened that night, it's still fresh in my memory. I can still feel, not only the beatings I received from you, but also how you wrecked and degraded my whole being." I said with tears flowing freely from my eyes.

I wanted to let him know how I feel. Not because I want to receive an apology from him, but to let him realize that what he feels for me isn't love.

Yoongi sat up and looked at me while I'm still laying down, I said while sobbing, "I- I can still feel the pain with your e-every touch when I lay beside y-you. Forgive me Jeonha, b-but I can't do it right n-now."

The King pulled me up to sit, then he embraced me tight and whispered to me,

"Forgive me for causing you pain and giving your mind a scar that will forever taint how you see me. I love you, Seokjin. Everything I do is only for you. All my actions were caused by my love for you. I-- I am very sorry, my Wangbi. But please don't think that I don't love you. I do, Seokjin. I really do."

"Yoongi, you must know your love for me is consuming the good in you. Love should be selfless. It should be patient and understanding. It means sacrificing for the one your heart truly desires.

Therefore, what you have for me isn't love. It is a compulsion that you have no control over. Hence, you hurt me. And you can't protect me from yourself."

I felt Yoongi's tears on my neck as he buried his face against it. I can hear him cry softly. But he inhaled deep and pulled back from hugging me. Then he composed himself and said,

"No, Seokjin. That's not true. When I say I love you, that means I do. I am the King, therefore what I tell you is what it is supposed to be. I have shown you numerous times my love for you and our children. Hence, you cannot just define my love for you as that. You are mine, Seokjin. You belong only to me.

I understand I must've frightened you with what I've done. But I will slowly erase that. For now, stay by my side and continue to show me love and loyalty. I won't force you anymore into something you don't wish to do."

I can see the defeated look in Yoongi's eyes. I know he always has a soft spot for me. Despite that, I don't intend to be soft for him again. I've given him the chance to steal my heart, I won't do the same mistake again.

I only nodded and laid my head on our shared pillow. Thankfully, Yoongi knows how to respect me this time.

*******

I opened my eyes wide after I finally heard Yoongi, snoring and deep asleep. I stood up and quietly took the bag I've hung by the window of the King's room.

I tiptoed my way out and nodded at the stationed guard by the door. He is a follower of Tae, hence I know I am safe.

At the end of the hallway, I already saw Soldier Tak waiting for me.

"Wangbi, it's time. Chief Namjoon is at the army headquarters."

"Let's go then while we have a chance."

*******