It was stunningly cold outside for a summer night in July. I was already shivering just after the sun set. I still didn't know why on earth I agreed to this. Betty, my best friend, invited me over to a little house party of hers with all our old friends from High School. I hadn't seen any of them since I graduated last year, except for Betty of course, so I was more than sure this would turn extremely awkward sooner rather than later.
From the distance I already heard the bass of the music blasting through the street and short after my best friend's house came into sight. I was just about to turn around and go back home and would've told my Blonde best friend I got sick, but right in that moment that said best friend spotted my small figure and cried out my name in excitement, "Toni! You made it! I almost thought you'd bail on me, bitch!"
When I finally reached her I only got a few awkward and quiet sounds out of my mouth. "Yeah.... here I am" I added a slight wave to my greeting to increase the awkwardness even more. Betty being her fast forward self and being a little tipsy as well, as I figured from her slight slurring, looked at me with a raised eyebrow and pulled me into a bone-crushing hug right after.
"You can go inside already and grab yourself a drink, I'll come soon as well." Betty told me after she had let me go out of her arms. Obliging her wish I trotted into her house and made my way into the kitchen where I guessed the drinks would be. My fear of being left alone to myself with no one I really knew had come true, so I figured I'd just get some alcohol into my blood system in hope of loosening up a little.
As my legs carried my body into the kitchen I had been in so many times before I kept my gaze down, trying to avoid making any eye contact with already intoxicated people that rushed past me. I hated being so unbelievably shy and insecure, but I just couldn't help myself since this was a character trait I had to live with.
Whilst I didn't pay much attention to where I was going with me head kept down, I slightly bumped into a person ahead of me. Being my uncoordinated self, I tripped over, instantly lost my balance and fell to the floor with a loud thud, becoming the center of attention.
The soft hands of the person I ran into helped me up since they weren't nearly as clumsy as me and didn't land on the floor like I did. As I finally regained my balance again and pushed the hair out of my face which blocked my sight I petrified in the moment I laid my eyes on her.
"Oh my God, are you okay, Toni?" her sweet voice echoed through the room leaving me startled. Staring right into her piercing, light brown eyes instantly threw me back to the time I would've done anything for this precious girl in front of me. The time when everything my mind revolved about was her and all my eyes yearned for was her gorgeous figure. I felt my heartbeat raise and my breathing quicken forcing me to inhale her intoxicatingly lovely scent I had enjoyed so many times she walked past me when we were still in High School.
When she removed her hand, she used to steady me with, from my arm I got ripped out of my thoughts and back into reality. The girl looked at me questioningly with her eyebrows raised so high they almost reached her hairline. In that moment I realized I had been staring at her for quite some time without saying or doing anything. In addition to that my jaw had unwillingly dropped as well and probably let me look like some dumbfounded weirdo.
"Yeah, I'm-... I'm fine, thanks" I finally brought out stuttering after what felt like hours. Right there in front of me stood Cheryl Blossom in all her glory. The most popular girl back then in High School and the girl I was madly in love with for years. I never had the balls to tell her that, though. Not that it would've made any difference since she made it very clear that she was straight when we played Truth or Dare at a party once and she got asked if she'd be open for a relationship with a girl which she answered with a simple "No" a split moment after the question filled the room, destroying all my hopes. Nevertheless, would it be a lie to say I didn't have any feelings for her anymore, even if they were only sexual.
