Little Secrets (h.s. au)

nine

The months that led to graduation are a blur and I barely talk or do anything. I’m in pain and all source of life I had felt was fueled through the adrenaline I felt while being with Harry. Jason was expelled and Harry had moved far away, no one knowing of our relationship aside from Jason and Porter. 

Porter has taken care of me, ensuring I’m not alone. My mother tries to help me but I gave up on her, her understanding towards my needs not there. We talk though, and she’s trying.

“It’s summer and you’re done with school, go out and have fun,” she says, but I shake my head. I curl deeper into my bed and shut my eyes, desperately trying to fade the pain.

Harry’s POV

“Where do you want to go today?” I ask Jess, her brown curls pulled onto the top of her head.

“The mall. I have to pick up swimsuits,” she says, my head nodding.

A year. A year ago today I met Brandi. There isn’t a day I don’t think about her. I hated walking away but I had no choice. We couldn’t say goodbye in the way I wanted but I’d give anything to talk to her. Since I had to move away, I went back home. My mum was delighted, Robin was thrilled, and my siblings were excited to see me again. I tried visiting my dad but he doesn’t remember me much; Alzheimer’s deteriorating his memory.

“Alright, let’s go,” I say, leading Jess to the car and driving us to the mall. I walk around with her and buy her whatever she wants, her annual pool party with her friends coming up.

“How’s that girl you were seeing?” she asks, my head shaking. She frowns and says she’s sorry, my shoulders shrugging.

“It’s alright,” I lie, leading her to the food court. We eat some pizza and she starts telling me about her friend’s phone and whatever her 13 year old friends are into, my lips curving as she starts obsessing over a boy band.

“Do you honestly think these boys will come to your middle school and ask you out?” I ask, her hand swatting my shoulder.

“Yes, they will. I love them,” she says, my lips releasing a laugh.

We finish up and I take her home, going up to Gabe’s room. He grabs his soccer ball and we walk outside, my feet kicking him the soccer ball.

“Did you ask that girl to the movies yet?” I ask, his head shaking.

“She makes me really nervous,” he explains, my feet stopping the ball.

“Just go for it. Say it’s not a date but a hang out,” I say, his head nodding.

“But what if she says no?” he asks, my lips curving.

“Then you bend over backwards to get her to say yes.” He laughs and I smile, ignoring the ache in my chest.

We walk inside after a while and I walk upstairs, my fingers dialing her number for the millionth time. I just listen to her voicemail to hear her voice, needing to hold her, kiss her, or just see her again to know she’s okay. I miss her.

Brandi’s POV

The world is a dark place. I stare out the window of an unknown room, my mother initially admitting me to a therapist to make sure I’m not depressed. But I am.

I’m so depressed and sad about everything that I can’t find the bright side in anything. Porter visits me every day and I try to have fun, occasionally smiling or laughing. I wish more than anything that I could see him one more time, just to make sure he’s okay.

Porter’s POV

I walk into a coffee shop after my class, searching the menu for Brandi’s favorite drink to try to brighten her day. She’s in a goddamn medical institution for depression. If I didn’t force her ‘lover’ to leave, she would’ve gotten seriously hurt and in deep trouble due to Jason.