Challenge The Inevitable

Life Ruined by Silence

I sit on the floor. All of us are. Ever since I stayed after Ryder convinced me, Bryce has been annoying me in any possible way to drive me out of the house. Ryder has spoken to him many times, but nothing helps.It has made me over anxious. I'm seriously considering leaving again. The worst part is that I don't really even know why he wanted to know Ryder's backstory that much. It makes me feel so unimportant that he was just trying to use me like that. Argh. It makes me so mad. I know I over think things too much, but I cant help it. It's just a part of my nature, so please forgive me.

Anyways, since the awkwardness at home, I usually stay out of the house as much as I can. And finally, I've considered getting a job. I mean, I've mentioned it once or twice to Ryder, but I'm actually serious now. I mean it would get me out of the house, it would get me money, but most importantly it would help me avoid Bryce. Recently, it has become obvious to me that Ryder seems to have an endless supply of money. It's kinda freaking me out. 

Likewise, right now as we sit in silence, all eyes are on me. I've gotten used to being the centre of attention, but that doesn't mean I still don't like it.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Jasper asks. It's kinda weird, ever since the situation with Bryce, everyone has been treating me differently, like they have to be careful what they say around me. At the same time they have been more confident. I mean Elliot and Evan, have even started to talk to me.

"Not this time mate. Sorry." I try to be as nice as possible.

"How 'bout a dollar?" Carter suggests.

"My thoughts are priceless, but nice try."

"Bet Ryder's priceless. Your's, pfft, nothing, not a cent." Bryce says bluntly.

"Of course you do." I regret saying it, but witty comebacks are a reflex.

"Guys no need to fight." Evan whispers. He's still shy, but at least he's actually contributing to discussions now. 

"Yeah Luna, no need to be rude." Bryce utters. I roll my eyes. This boy just keeps getting worse. I see Evan look at me with an expression on his face that says 'don't reply to him', but I can't resist.

"I learn from you. Show me the way, oh wise one." He gets up to stand over me.

"That's enough! Ryder yells, "I've had enough of you two". Bryce sits back down. I agree with Ryder, this is just plain annoying.

"I'm sorry, it's not my fault." I sigh into Ryder's ear, "Are you ever planning to tell him?".

Ryder just shrugs his shoulders. "Maybe." I know that means no, at least for now.

"I understand." I say, even though I don't, "So, I guess this is as good time as ever to tell you, I'm going to apply for a job." He just stares at me. 

Then, finally he says, "Why?". He speaks calm, but his hands are clenched. Beneath his mask, he is angry.

"Isn't it obvious?" This time the answer was completely obvious. However, in my opinion, he just wanted to hear me say it.

He looks down at his feet. "We need to talk."

* * *

The ocean is strong. The waves crash against the rock, tumbling over anyone who stands near them. Somehow, it makes me nervous. I know Ryder has had a hard past, but he's already told me about it. I've even told him about my past, which was nothing compared to his. What could he possible want to tell me now? 

Our whole walk to the pier, was silent. It was as if Ryder was assembling the words in his head. Struggling to find courage to publicize them to me. I know from the moment I first saw him, I would develop a strong love for him, but I know first loves never last. Not at my age, at least. We've kissed once before. Although, it feels like it occurred one hundred years ago. His feelings must have faded for me. I mean he already was emotional, as he was sharing his story. Maybe crying triggered something and made him need attention. I was the only one to give it to him. I was the only one there with him, so it only makes sense.

I understand his dilemma. I have always desired attention. It's all because of the loneliness in my past years. It's not my fault. If it was my choice I would only wish for peace. Peace with my parents, peace with Bryce, Peace with my former classmates, Peace with the strangers who I pass everyday, Peace with the world. In my case, peace is impossible. I can't go back and change my past, and if I could I probably wouldn't. It makes me who I am, and besides sometimes the right things to do in life are painful. 

To break the silence I finally speak up, "It's okay Ryder, you don't have to tell me."

"Oh, but I already have." I look around, what is he talking about? I see no clues. I notice his phone is directly in front of me. I look at the phone then him, but he shakes his head.

I turn around. Immediately the wall catches my eye. My jaw drops. A mural is painted on the wall. It was behind me all this time.

"Did you paint this?" I ask.

"No, but you'll never guess who did."

"It was Bryce wasn't it." He nods his head. Who knew Bryce was so talented.

I scan the mural. On the wall, he has painted a forest. The forest in which he tried to hurt me. Although it seemed to be more beautiful. Flowers everywhere. Then, directly in the middle, a silhouette of a boy and girl kissing. Underneath them, the floor is cracking, so they would soon have to part. It's too beautiful to describe.

Ryder didn't need to say anything, I already knew what he was trying to tell me. Bryce is in love with me, and Ryder is illustrated as the cracks. He's ruining our chances. But still, Ryder wanted to elaborate.

"Keep this in mind, when you yell at him, next time. He's more emotional than he lets on."

"I don't think I could ever forget this." My words were nothing but the truth.

- - - - - - - - - -

Really can't be bothered to write additional notes so...

Sorry for any silly mistakes. Until next time, over and out. BYES >_<

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