Deirdre Chen: Saviour of the Multiverse

Chapter 3

Mengo

Through the window, Mengo saw the rift fizzle away and Earth form in front of him. Mengo’s sister had located the child by intercepting the signals from satellites. By the way Humans, we REALLY need to clean up our orbit, we’re like a boisterous child throwing paper towels at the ceiling of our toilets.
  “We’re nearly there, Mengo.”
  “Good,” Mengo said, but he was not good.
  “30 seconds.”
  “Excellent,” Mengo added, even though his current mood fell far short of excellent.
  “Get ready.”
  “Ready,” Mengo said cocking his gun, but believe you me, he was not at all ready. Mengo had forgotten to charge his gun.
  He beheld concrete snakes with strange white lines, metal beasts with round legs of rubber, sped up and down their backs. The Lormian Glory flew towards ‘Supermarket’. It landed on top of one of these creatures with round rubber legs and metal bodies, due to Bengo’s incompetent parking.  As he marched down the ramp, he was greeted by two humans who offered them nothing more than the stunned looks on their faces.
  “Greetings Mr and Mrs. Sapien, my name is Mengo.”               
   “My name is Keith,” the ape shuddered as air escaped his lips.
  “Mengo, we have no time.” Bengo had a point, so they moved on leaving the awestruck Volvo owners to their own devices.

#

  ‘Supermarket’ was a befuddling maze of food canyons. The tracker was taking them where they needed to be, until Bengo was ensnared by another human.
  “Want to try some Houmous?” the female asked, standing behind a table. Mengo towered over this mewling savage and asked.
  “I am the ruler of an empire that stretches through the entire Multiverse, so why would I want to try your delicious Houmous?”
  “I’ll try some,” Bengo chimed in. Mengo was about to protest, but it was probably for the best; he didn’t want Bengo getting him into another mess. Ground chickpeas and oil held his little brother at bay, whilst Mengo continued in his pursuit.
  He found the child, you know how the conversation went. The different angle I can provide here is that when they closed their eyes, they didn’t notice that he couldn’t fire on them as at that very moment the gun ran out of battery. To make matters worse, Cassie ran over his foot with a strange chariot.
Back to Deirdre for the rest.

#

So yeah, that ‘Chariot’ was in fact a shopping trolley.
  “Get in!” Cassie shouted. Deirdre wasn’t going to say no either. I’ll admit, running would’ve been a better move than being pushed in a trolley. But kids are stupid; not as stupid as adults, they haven’t learnt how to be THAT stupid, but stupid all the same.
  Cassie was like a prepubescent locomotive. Not that it stopped Mengo from closing in on them. Deirdre swiped some eggs from the poultry section.  That’s right, she’d bought eggs to a laser fight. She cracked him right between the eyes, Deirdre was giving Mengo shell shock, getting him right between the eyes every time. So, I guess you could say that the yoke was on him. Look, the publishers called me in to narrate this book last minute, please don’t sack me, I need to move out of my Mum’s house. I’m 27!
  With Deirdre looking backwards and Cassie tucking her head down to push the trolley, neither of them saw the floor polisher. The front wheels hit it, turning the trolley into a catapult that fired them at the bread section. Deirdre hit the floor elbow first; Cassie rushed over.
  “Deirdre!”
  “Ow, my uterus!” Deirdre cried out.
  Deirdre thought of her weird aunt who once told her that she wanted to die in a Buddhist temple surrounded by tigers. Now, Deirdre thought that it would’ve been preferable to how she was about to snuff it, surrounded by tiger loaves.
  The Green Git approached. Behind him, Deirdre saw the drinks section; she shouldn’t be focusing on that when she was about to die. Deirdre just really wanted a drink, and for her and Cassie not to die, but she’d have settled for the drink. She saw the little store brand cola in the distance.
 And then it was right in her face.