One Warm Winter

Kallias-Part 4

I laid in my bed, alone, late at night, just me and the stars. The sound of snow crickets hummed outside my open window. Snowflakes drifted in and out, up and around. I tried to fall asleep, my mind still thinking about the girl. Her hair, silky and smooth, pinned up like a queen. Her delicate features, those voluptuous curves, though that wasn't why I was drawn to her. It was those jewel-colored dark blue eyes, framed with thick lashes, full with emotion. The small smile that graced her beautiful lips as they curved up slightly. Her pale skin, shoulders lightly freckled. As soon as my gaze went to her eyes, something inside me clicked, snapped shut, satisfied. But there was something tugging, pulling us close. I wanted to take her head in my hands, pull her to me, to feel her, but I stopped myself. I don't even know her name, I can't just go up to her and kiss her, I had thought in that moment. I tossed and turned, my mind filled with her, her perfection, her spirit, that feeling that had washed over me as I looked at her. I looked at my watch on the nightstand, it was 2:00 am. I got in the bath, not able to sleep, and resolved to find her in the morning, already set with determination. 

I strode through the almost empty halls, everyone still asleep at 5 am. I had tried to wait longer, almost pulling my hair out in the process, but I desperately needed to see her face. I knocked on her door, hesitating for a moment, and then knocked more surely. The door slowly swung open, revealing the girl. She muttered,

"Come on in Willa." When I didn't move, confused, she looked up. Her gorgeous eyes widened, looking me up and down. "It's you." I nodded. 

"I just couldn't stop thinking about you," I admitted. Her hair was tangled, dark circles under her eyes, only a thin blanket wrapped around her naked body, but she was still the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. She murmured, her melodic, rich voice echoing in my ears,

" I couldn't stop either." Then I realized it. The feeling, the click.

"I think you're my mate." I suddenly blurted out, a quiver in my voice. I immediately regretted it. What if she didn't feel the same way as me? What if she pushed me away? What if she was disgusted? I felt I couldn't live without her- but those doubts were quickly shoved aside. My face was in her soft hands, her warm lips against mine, but she abruptly pulled away. She looked at me, guilt and doubt clouding her crystal eyes.

"I love you, but for the best, forget me. You don't want a girl like me. You don't want me." I answered her with a sure,

"Of course I want you, you are perfect, no matter your past," our lips pressed against each other again. My hands stroked her lower back, and a small sound escaped her open lips. Her tongue flicked in and out- then she stopped. She looked up at me once more, guilt filling her.

"I have a fiance, you don't want me. I am scarred, I'm not like the others, I don't deserve you. I love you, but to him, it doesn't matter if you are my mate. I can't love you, just forget me," she choked out, tears spilling out of those deep eyes. I took her hands. 

"It don't care about what your fiance thinks about me, I don't care if you aren't the same, I love you, I can protect you," I answered, putting my hands around her. She brushed me off. 

"I can't love you. Don't make this any harder than it already is. Leave." Tears pouring down her cheeks, she kissed me, deeply, one more time, with anguish on her face, pushed me out the door. The door slammed shut after me, leaving me in frigid silence. I sat on the cold, hard, floor. A singular tear traced a path down my face. My body was motionless, devoid of the warmth that the girl had provided. My heart throbbed, the connection still there, but chilly and weak. The birds chirped outside, the sunlight streaming in. I stood up. No matter how I felt, how much I ached for someone, I still had to fulfill my duties as a High Lord.