In my many years of working in the media sector as a professional twitter consultant, I've come across many people who voice their opinions with hostility, safeguarded by their anonymity. Needless to say that I have become immune to the charms of social media and find it becoming completely monotonous. Every case has the same specific pattern. Someone comes forward with an issue and then it becomes a trending hashtag if it has enough potential to take a Chicken Tikka dish head-on in terms of masala. Those who see that potential are visibly divided in two groups: people who think they are in the right and people who think they are also in the right. Though the scale of stupidity in those tweets does not come close to the stupidity portrayed by some aggressive tweeters, such as the Blond President or the self-proclaimed Bollywood A-lister who have been tagged in the same category and banned permanently from twitter. When I was desperate to get out of this repetitive chain of tweets I came across a tweet which piqued my curiosity. It read 'If you think about it, the most leftist people in the country are the Right-Wingers' under the handle '@theWokeLaddoo
Make no mistake, even I thought that the tweet was sub-par at best with no clarity whatsoever. What I was interested in is the ideology of the person who had tweeted it. I decided to contact him and the conversation that followed, came as a surprise. He was open to discussing everything I asked from the beginning and also did not mind me to sharing our conversation with the world. Following is the brief interaction we had in the format of a transcript. Hope you find it enjoyably enlightening as I did.
Acronyms – @theTwitterPundit: TP (Myself)
@theWokeLaddoo: WL
TP: Hello, I just came across your tweet. About the right wingers in India? You may me know as the 'consultant giant' in the Twitter business? Think of me as the guy who charges dumb people to make them look cool on Twitter and your tweet has definitely caught my eye.
WL: Whoaa, ofc I know you. You're famous and shit. What do you wanna know? Anything for the man who can make trash actors like @HumanBeing actually bearable on Twitter XD
[I was a little disappointed because judging by his text message, he positively was younger than I would have expected him to be]
TP: It is the part of the job. I would like to know what your thought process was before tweeting that. It is not clear to me how you have made that connection.
WL: Well dude, what can I say. I just thought that Hinduism not being a legit religion and all, the right wingers who aggressively support it are the ones actually promoting the left wing agendas
TP: I think your ideas about the right and left are not distinct. I still cannot grasp what you are trying to convey.
WL: What are Left-Wing agendas man?! To support and liberate the disadvantaged right? In my opinion the most disadvantaged class would be the class of people who follow something as liberal as 'way of life' rather than a sticking to one specific religion.
TP: So wait, you're saying that being a Hindu is not religious? Careful now, you might just start riots.
WL: Every person living in India is a Hindu coz it's not a religious term yo, it's a geographical one. Hindustan--Hindu? Same as India--Indian. Plus the word 'Hindu' originated just because some lazy ass Persians didn't take the effort to know what they were invading and couldn't pronounce 'S' in Sindhu which consequently became the (s)hindu region.
TP: Okay, so what about people who state that Hinduism is the one of the oldest religions ever to exist? Are they so plainly stupid to make a statement which can be refuted so easily?
WL: I don't need to tell you how stupid some people can be. It is often misconstrued as one to promote different agendas, like every religion on this planet. We got no holy book or anything and I like to view Ramayan and Mahabharat as a part of our culture, not religion. The four Vedas which apparently predate every literature to ever exist also don't mention Hinduism as a religion. They tell us to 'Pursue the truth and to accept nothing but the truth' which sounds what a hipster on drugs would say
TP: But where do you incorporate the Left and Right agendas into all of this?
WL: I don't, the people of this country do. What do you mean by Right-wing? It's a bunch of people who support somewhat conservative or reactionary views. Now, the ruling party is a Right-wing party no doubt and they were smart enough to strategically make 'Hindutva' as their spearhead to win the hearts of people and ergo the elections. But the half-baked brains of the masses did not take long to create a connection between the two and VOILA! Funny thing is that nobody from either sides would go against me if I say that Right wing means promoting Hindutva. That is how it is to be a part of herd-mentality XD
TP: Wow. These views are surprisingly mature for someone with that twitter handle. But I have to ask you this, who do you think you are, given the two choices?
WL: That's easy dude...
A leftist right-winger
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A Philosophical Guide for the Average Millennial
Short Story"A captivating hook sentence." "A remark to call out the main-stream attempt to grab attention." Lastly, an apology to the reader who got bored in the first two lines. Day in and day out. People get up and go about their day. They try their best...
