L O Y A L; [d.m.]

| G R E Y S K I E S |

~Draco's POV~

My heart had been disintegrated by the way Kat had looked me before she left. She told me, in the silence and unspoken words, that she had loved me despite my Dark Mark and my failure to let her in.

How could I let her in? Knowing that I am the one to kill the only family she has left? How am I supposed to rely on her for something as big as this?

She loved me, still. Despite my tantrum and my possessiveness. I should have let her in sooner. I should have let her truly meet the boys. I should have let her in the door.

The last of the papers had floated down to the wooden floor. My dorm room was a wreck. I had over turned dressers, ripped pages out of books, torn my sheets. I couldn't stand the lasting memory of Kat being the one where she left me.

I had let her in. I shared my bed with her. There had been no one else. I would give a thousand Pansies just to have one more moment with Kat. To tell her that I feel the same. That despite her insistent need to fix things; that despite her ever loud mouth; that despite that she puts her heart in the wrong hands: that I truly loved her.

From the moment she stepped into my life, I had never known what it was like to be loved unconditionally. With my Father, there were always conditions. I had to be the perfect son. I had to be the one to save them. With my Mother, I had to be the one who did the right thing for our name sake. I had to be one to step up to right the wrong that my Father did.

With Kat, there were no conditions. All I had to do was trust her and let her in my life. Let her into my heart.

I had failed.

I kept my heart locked tight. After all these years, I finally tasted what true peace was, and I threw it all away. Because I am a coward.

I can't face telling Kat what I been tasked to do.

I can't look at her knowing that I would take away the one person she truly depended on.

I wipe my tears and nose with the back of my hand before opening the door to find Crabbe, Goyle, and Blaise standing bewildered.

"Get out of my way," I spit. I try pushing past them, but Blaise has a tight grip on my arm.

"We just seen Katrina Turnwell leaving in tears," Blaise says before looking at the wreckage. "That bad of a shag?"

"Don't," I stand in front of Blaise, my anger pulsating out of my skin. I can feel the heat as I look at each one of them. "Don't you dare talk about Kat that way. Ever. Again. Understand?" The three nod before I finish.

"I swear on my own life that it will be the last thing you regret. If I hear so much as one disrespectful or derogatory word come from any of you, you'll have me to deal with."

"Mate," Goyle calls out to me, but I ignore him.

I push past my friends and make my way down the stairs. I finally realize that I had spoken to them through gritted teeth. My anger had taken ahold of me and nothing would ease this unless I talk to Kat.

"Malfoy, it's nearly midnight, can't this wait until morning?" Goyle grabs my arms before I can reach the door. "C'mon let's clean the mess you made; it's the least you could do."

Each one of the boys took turns guarding the door in case I got the itch to leave. I thought many times jinxing them, but I knew deep down, they were right. It was well past midnight. Kat could wait.

I toss in my sleep, dreaming of Kat falling from the Astronomy tower. It was slow motion as I reached out for her, but never in my reach.

Next morning, I storm through the castle looking every where that I thought could be; my heart breaking more with each dead end. I was so consumed with finding Katrina that I thought I had saw her black curly hair, but it was just a Ravenclaw.