27 December 2021

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its 4 am in my country.....I was going just watching random video on YouTube and one video come up.......something tittle with I miss you daddy......that was not a video.....there was only voice......that make me fell that maybe one day I will gonna fell the same thing......when my dad will not gonna be with me anymore.......

I am a girl who just don't like to talk or listen about future like what I am doing today is the only thing I wanna know not like I don't have plans for future....I have...but I just don't wanna say it to anyone.....and related to this topic sometime I just ignore my dad...like he is saying something and I am doing my own ting not paying attention on him.......I did something like that today....and at the end he just go with should i just stop talking to you.......that time i did not thing a lot about it but.......

 after the video I watch......it just roaming around my mind like when ever I behave with him like that haw he feels......that must hurt him.......

i cannot change the past but in future I can be careful to not hurt him......and I will not gonna hurt him anymore......even if I don't want to listen to him i can say it to him after he finish ....not in the meddle ....right?????

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