epiphany- punznap

sixteen- Average

Average

sapnap sits in the starbucks parking lot, regretting a lot of things.

how the hell did they end up here? sapnap sighs to himself.

punz's text said he wanted to talk which could mean so many different things. unspoken things both of them have neglected. why punz has been so silent?

he's startled by a knock on his cars window.

punz.

he steps out of his car, punz and him look at each other for a second. sapnap notices the scruff of a beard he has on his face, and how his hair is a bit of a mess. but other than that he's punz.

"do you want to um, go inside?" punz asks.

"yeah."

the boys walk inside and they sit at a table near the window. sapnap see's a few business men working on their laptops along with some college students.

the smell of coffee wakes sapnap up a bit.

punz offers to go and order something for them, sapnap tells him his order and he walks up to the counter.

sapnap sits their for a bit waiting for punz to come back, then it hits him. this is more like a fucking date than a "hey, can we talk?" type of thing.

he cant tell if he's overthinking this or not. he hasn't talked to punz in a week so why now ask him to go on a date?

or maybe its not a date at all, but sapnap has no idea why the hell he is even here then.

maybe dream was right. right about all of this. sapnap doesn't want to believe it, because its punz. tall, blonde, blue-eyed punz.

punz, the guy he's pretty sure he's falling for.

punz soon returns handing sapnap his drink and sitting down at the table.

they sit in silence. sapnap sips his drink slowly and punz does the same.

he wants punz to say something, anything really. he can feel his heartbeat in his fingertips and its killing him.

"so you wanted to talk?" sapnap says awkwardly.

punz clears his throat, setting his drink down onto the table, "yeah, i did." sapnap raises an eyebrow, prodding him to continue.

"im uh- leaving." is all he says.

"what'd you mean you're leaving? you already moved out."

god he feels dumb, he though it was a date. he laughs silently to himself, punz doesn't notice it.

"im going back to texas."

sapnap sits there in disbelief. so he decides to ghost him then, then drop the news that he's leaving?

"what why? i thought the whole reason you came here was because you wanted to "explore" and "meet new people.'" they stare at each other, sapnap tries to hide the sad look on his face that he knows is there. "sap.. its my mom."

he doesn't know much about punz's family, knows about his sisters and his mom and that's it. but he knows he cares. when punz was first staying with him and dream he'd hear through the thin walls in the early morning, "yeah mom, i know," and "yep, love you mom." he cares.

he shouldn't be upset. if it was his mom he'd hop on the soonest flight and be there. but he can't help it.

"oh."

"yeah."

they still look at one another, punz looks sad. its a little selfish of sapnap to think that sadness is about him.

"is she sick?" sapnap asks carefully, he doesn't want to cross a line.

"yeah, she has been. for a few years now but its starting to get worse. i talked to my sister the other day and she's just starting college you know? she can't just drop out to take care of my mom. and my other sister is a high school student, so same thing."

sapnap nods his head.

"when are you leaving?"

"wednesday. it was the earliest flight i could get." it was monday. that was so soon.

"but why'd you move out? that was so sudden." sapnap asks as he finishes his drink.

"i was stressing, i didn't want you to worry about it. also i didnt move out. i just went to a hotel."

"but you brought your stuff?"

"i figured i was gonna have to leave. cause of my mom. trust me sapnap, if i could stay i would, one thousand percent i would."

sapnap signs, pulling a loose thread on his shorts. punz grabs sapnaps unoccupied hand, holding it with his own across the table. "why don't we get out of here? my hotel room does have great room service." he laughs.

and of course, he cant say no.

he ignores the pain in his heart, swallow's it the best he can as they leave, he ignores it as he follows behind punz in his own car, he tries to forget about it as they enter the hotel building.

but its there.

-
AYO happy new years!

only one more chapter who's excited?!