Hope for my Future

Chapter Eight

Nicole

I kissed him deeply, shoving him against the wall behind him. It was nothing like how it was with Jessie. My mate was gentle and sweet and tender, and we fit together so perfectly we really were like two halves of the same whole. With Tanner, on the other hand, it was like I could pour everything into him. All my darkest emotions and thoughts. All my rage at how life had kept on kicking me in the guts. He was strong, he could take it.

His kiss was firm, hands pressing me tightly against him as he used his tongue to explore my mouth. He broke away to trace his lips along my jaw and down my neck, his hands grazing down my back in a way that made me long for more. My hands went to the buttons on his shirt, the message clear.

We stumbled our way into his room and fell onto his bed. It was the first time I had been in there, and normally I would have been curious, but for now all I cared about was the way his hands were sliding up my thighs, tugging my shorts off, tracing over my stomach. Our tongues danced as I tangled my fingers into his thick, bronze-coloured hair. Heat pooled in my lower stomach, and I forgot everything but the feel of him.

***

Tanner

I knew this was a bad idea, but I couldn't stop. There was something about her, the smoothness of her skin, the pressure of her lips on mine, the way she took what she wanted without hesitation. I had no idea how my hatred for her had turned so quickly to desire.

I hovered over her, slipping her shirt up over her head. She was beautiful, her body slender but still with generous curves. I lowered my head and took one nipple in my mouth while my hand caressed the other, enjoying the way she arched into me. From there, I moved down the valley between her breasts, kissing her smooth stomach, tracing her faint stretch marks with my tongue.

She pulled me back up to her mouth, kissing me fiercely, before she reached down to unbuckle my pants and I sprang free, ready for her. I teased at her core with my fingers, but she wasn't having any of that. She grabbed me and lined me up with her, her message clear. She was rough with me, still no gentleness to spare, but I didn't care. Lust overrode every sense, every thought. In this moment, I wanted her, and that was all that mattered.

I pushed my way inside her, groaning at the feel of her, and we began to move together. It wasn't like it had been with my mate, but we found our way, found the rhythm that pushed us closer to the edge. Soon enough she came, her eyes fluttering as she moaned, and I quickly followed her. The moment stretched, burning its way into my memory, forever changing how I looked at her.

The moment passed and I slid out, rolling onto my back. We lay in silence for a moment, panting and covered in sweat.

Well, that was unexpected.

I glanced over at her, feeling incredibly unsure and out of my depth. She was staring up at the ceiling, her face unreadable. I froze, having no clue what to do now. I really wasn't the type to have one-night stands, having only slept with my mate, once, about seven years ago.

"Well, thank you for that." Her voice startled me, and I frowned as she got up, grabbing her t-shirt and slipping it back over her head.

"Umm... you're welcome? Where are you going?" I raised myself up on one elbow, staring after her in shock.

She was on her way to the door, but at that she glanced over her shoulder and raised her eyebrows at me. "To my room. See you in the morning."

She slipped out the door, and I was left with absolutely no idea what to think.

***

Nicole

I left the house before dawn the next morning, pretending to myself that I wasn't avoiding him. Andy had been in touch yesterday, asking me again to attend a training session, and that was why I was heading out the door as the sun peaked over the horizon.

No other reason.

I ducked inside the training centre, trying to look less furtive than I actually felt. A small group was assembled in the centre of the mats; Andy, Vic, Anh, and three people I didn't know; two wolves of maybe mid-thirties and one preteen pup. Anh spotted me first and smiled his warm, free smile.

"Nicki! Over here!"

I felt like rolling my eyes at him but suppressed it. As if I'd be going anywhere else. I made a show of turning towards the exercise machines and laughed at him when he called out to me again, louder and slightly panicked.

I joined the group, smiling at them all in greeting, and ruffled Anh's hair.

"Hey, Nicole, nice to see you again," Andy greeted me in that deep voice of his. "This is Jayden and Bree, our Gamma pair, and this is their daughter, Emma."

I nodded politely and shook their hands, my brows going up as I looked back to Andy. He chuckled at my obvious question.

"Jayden runs the training around here, so we thought this would be a good way to test out what you're capable of. Just because you can fight doesn't mean you can teach, after all."

I understood the logic. "Okay, so, I'm guessing I'm training Emma, then?"

Andy nodded at me, and the adults all stepped away, clearing a space for me.

"Hey, I've got it!" Vic called as he walked backwards behind the others. "You spent some time with the Mauri people in New Zealand!"

I had to laugh at that. "I'm not an expert in tribal tattoos, you goof!" I called back, before turning to the shy pup beside me.

"All right then, Emma. Let's have a quick go at sparring, just so I can see where you're at." I smiled gently at her, seeing her nerves on display. This pup couldn't have been more than twelve-years-old. "Don't worry, I'm sure a Gamma's daughter already has some amazing moves to show me."

She beamed at me, much more at ease, and we moved through some simple sparring, keeping it light. I watched her carefully but had to force my mind back into gear several times. A pair of blue-grey eyes were butting into my head. Eyes that kept morphing into other, harsher ones. I shook it off as best I could, knowing I had to deal with it all later, and turned to the pup before me.

"All right, that's enough for now. You're doing really well, but I can tell you've been trained by a big, burly male. Am I right?"

Emma peeked at her dad, earning a few chuckles from the group on the sidelines.

"Thought so." I grinned at her. "One of the things you have to remember is that you're going to be smaller than most of your opponents, even when you're an adult. So, instead of trying to meet them head on, you have to learn to use their advantages against them."

I heard Az's voice drift through my head, the words I'd heard from her over and over coming out easily. I'd been a in a few fights with other rogues before the Ring, for sure, but those were less frequent than one would assume, and involved a lot of weighing odds and running away. Rogues, especially female rogues, didn't actually stand and fight all that often. The complete opposite of the way things were in the Ring, where it was nothing but stand and fight.

"If your opponent is fast, like me, you need to wear them down, wait till they've worn themselves out and are starting to get sloppy. Dodge until they tire out, got it? But if they're all brute strength, you have to let their own force and momentum get them down."

I pulled Andy over and asked him to punch directly at my face, and I demonstrated how to shift around him, grabbing his wrist and using his own weight to propel him past my body.

"If you stand still and take a punch like that, you're history."

We continued for a moment longer, but I could see I'd won the adults over. Anh and Vic were both sporting broad smiles, Andy looked smug, and the Gamma pair were nodding thoughtfully. I couldn't help but grin as I took in their faces.

I was in. That feeling was enough to stave off the darkness brewing inside, for the moment at least.