Ok. Well. Looks like I've finally fucking done it. I love it how nobody fucking seems to care. I fucking love and appreciate it. I was so fucking sad. And then I wasn't. I loved myself with a burning passion. Buts that's gone. That's fucking gone. I don't understand how I can be so happy and then all of that turns to absolute shit and to have no one notice is just fan-fucking-tastic. Like, if someone were to just tell me that it'll be okay. That I'll be okay. That everything will be okay. I just want one goddamn person. But I don't have one. I have people that'll get angry at me when I try to express my emotions. I have people that tell me I'm stupid for what I do. I have people that are disgusted and revolted by me, plain blank period. I have people who lie. I have people that says this is all just for attention, when its really not. If I wanted attention,I would post pictures of my cuts. And post pictures and text people about the way I actually feel and just blowing it out if proportion. But I fucking don't. I keep it all bottled up inside and I plaster a fake smile every fucking day. I don't tell anyone. I just sit there, my mind racing with thoughts of ways I could possibly kill myself and ways to make myself bleed. But I don't tell anyone none of those things, because I don't wanna hurt people. I don't wanna bother people with my problems. My mom always said, I'm one of those kinds of people that will listen to others problems and just absorb them. I absorb them and I try to fix them, but I never fix my own problems. I apologize for talking about myself for so long. I don't like how this note is so morbid but its what it is. Another thing to add to my list of failures. Love everybody.
-tay
xoxoxoxoxo
