DBS: Playing With My Heart

Prologue

Warning: I forgot to mention there will be swearing, especially very explicit swears in near future of this book. Enjoy. '

Life's a bitch. It's a real bitch when it comes to those who are conflicted with pain and sorrow. Those who are abused, tortured, cheated, murdered, or emotionally harmed by him/herself. Most people troubled by their own trauma managed to move on with professional help and move on with their lives. But some refused to move on, especially those who refused help.

There are short results of refusing help: making themselves miserable for life, harm themselves physical, mental, emotional, or eventually resulting in suicide. But some prefer to live longer before death comes for them. Yes, they are afraid of death; only because they won't know what truly lies beyond their world. But they begged for it only to end their pain.

    Around the world shows many lives of different difficult individuals. However, there is one person who is the main focus of this situation. A young woman in her late twenties, a 5 foot and 1 inch tall with a more obese figure. She wore her more comfortable outfit: a black sweater with a short zipper, blue jeans, and black and white checkered sneakers. Her brown black curly medium hair hung low in the center behind her shoulders. Ears halfway hidden in the hair, showing red spots by the body's temperature. Her hands hidden within her pockets. She carries a black purse with only three zippers: one main compartment, and two smaller compartments.

    Focusing on the frontal profile, she has distinctive features: perfect arched eyebrows in the same color as her hair, plump shaped face, smooth tanned skin tone, small nose, small pair of tinted red colored lips, long eyelashes, and a pair of chocolate colored eyes.

Her eyes expressed a more sad emotion, she was crying earlier wherever she went. It expresses her heartbroken emotion. Whatever made her sad got to mean that someone she once loved betrayed her and replaced her with someone more beautiful and better than herself. She sometimes hates her own life: being a fat loser who doesn't know how to make her life better.

    She stopped, standing there as she wiped her tears away. She got to come home without being seen by her parents and siblings. She doesn't want to be bothered since they cannot understand what heartbrokenness feels. Once she gets to her room, she'll spend many hours getting rid of her depression. In her case, she has always been depressed since her early teenage years. And over the years, her depression gets worse and worse mentally. There's no pill or cure to her depression, it has to be decided by how she'll find her happiness. But she finds it futile and gives up on happiness, she will be in her own world; a world of her own loneliness, pain, and sadness in her heart.

    She is a woman who was betrayed by her once loyal lover, now convinced that she cannot trust any guy. She did meet her first lover in her first year of high school and dated him for a year: sadly he stole over a thousand dollars and abandoned her. She was angry by his action and eventually, her money was never returned since he spent it all on drugs that he overdosed on and died. She'll never forgive those who used her for money, sex, and tore her heart in pieces repeatedly.

    She shook her head, forgot her hurtful memories and opened the front door. She is living in a modern time country known as the USA. She experiences recent events since college: a new president since November was selected and he is the worst president they ever had. He did create job opportunities for the unemployed, but sadly she was rejected over five hundred job positions.

She asked for a  student loan forgiveness to pay off her loan debt. But they denied her request and made her face anxieties and fear that she won't be able to pay them. In fact, she feared the only way to pay them all off was by being a cleaning lady in federal prison while being in prison for not paying her loans. All that president did is help only those who show decent careers and ones with well experienced people with or without degrees.