"It's just you and me again," Your grip loosened against the handle of the umbrella, letting it fall onto the ground that you sat on. In front of you—the [last name] family grave, "Kazuya." Multiple snowflakes fell onto your head now that the umbrella was no long covering you.
"It's Christmas Eve. Meaning that another year... has passed by." You knocked the base of the grave with your drink bottle, "Cheers, to another holiday." You've made it a tradition to come out and visit him every Christmas – no matter what the time of day was. That's why you've been outside in the cold snow for over half a day; it was now ten o'clock at night.
"I didn't forget your gift like last year." You nodded with your pride hanging on your shoulders, "Ta-da! I got you a pair of slippers. Now your feet won't be cold wherever you are. It'll match well with the beanie I got you for your birthday this year. And don't worry, I have it in my safekeepings! I wouldn't leave something like that out here."
Only God knows how you've lasted this long without going crazy today. Talking to Kazuya was really only a coping mechanism for yourself. It helped you know that you weren't alone by talking to him.
"I'll bring my friends here next time, if I can. That way I can introduce you to them. But I'm sure you see them around me all the time. Oh, I have an idea. I'll tell you what I got them for Christmas. Let's start off with Hina-san. I bought her a cute hair accessory of sakura blossoms. She was wearing a pink yukata for that festival in August and I thought it would go well with that... Wait, it's not like she's gonna be wearing her yukata everywhere. I'm an idiot." You rubbed your head of your thoughts before moving on.
"Then for Emma-san, I got her a beret, only because she looks good in everything. I thought it would suit her eyes. With Draken-san, I got him cheap rings. I can see him wearing a lot of jewellery in the future, or maybe not. But they'll look good on him. I bought mittens for Mikey-san. He's always complaining that his hands are cold that's why he likes to hold mine a lot. I was contemplating for a while what I should get Takemichi-san then it hit me – clothes! So I got him a shirt and pants. He should get some tips from Chifuyu-san, he cannot dress for his life.
"Speaking of Chifuyu-san, I got him cat toys. Well, they're for Peke J, but he'll like them too. I got Mitsuya-san a pocket sewing kit, it suits him! For the Kawata twins, I bought them each one of those toys from a crane game. They had to be the most expensive gift since I spent so many coins just trying to get them from the claw machines. Lastly, Baji-san. It might be simple, but I got him a bunch of shrine charms. I remember he carried one around so I thought it would be a good present. What do you think, Kazuya?"
Silence replied instead. "Yeah, I agree." You jokingly responded. "I didn't forget about mom or dad either. I got mom some beauty products and dad, a bottle of vitamins."
You shook your head of all the snow that had piled up, some falling onto your shoulders. Despite being next to him for so long, it's like you haven't even been there for five minutes. Time seemed endless when you're talking to Kazuya. You didn't hate it – instead, it calmed you from the storm you call life.
There wasn't anything to worry about when you were with him. It was probably your favourite spot in the whole world; right next to your big brother. "Even though I probably look happy, I'm really not, Kazuya. Nothing has felt right since you died... I know, I say this every year, but I just want to see you again. For one last time. I want you to hug me again and tell me that everything is going to be okay. I don't know if I want to be here anymore. I feel... I don't even know what I feel.
"My friends... they mean the world to me. I love them a lot. They make me happy. But, everything seems to point back at you though. Without you in my life anymore, it's as if I'm following a rocky road. A line that hasn't been drawn yet. I'm just walking aimlessly ahead. It's like everyone has dreams, while I'm stuck in the past. I don't get it though. I can't let go of you, Kazuya. I want you back... Hopefully, I'll be able to see you soon."
YOU ARE READING
This World To You | tokyo revengers x reader
Fanfictionyou weren't supposed to meet them. you weren't supposed to make friends with them. you weren't supposed to gain feelings for any of them. you were supposed to visit the shrine-but here they were, sitting in front of it like it was nobody's business...
