TO LIVE FOR

0.4 SHE WAS ALONE

She woke to someone kicking her makeshift bed. 

"Wake up." Morgan hissed from above the half-awake Marie. "Breakfast is in ten, and you need a shower. Here." She threw a messily folded pile of clothes beside Marie then turned and paced toward the door. Just as she was about to leave, she turned on her heals, leaning against the frame as she spoke. "And remember what we talked about. I wouldn't want you getting into any sort of trouble." With that she turned once more and left. 

"Dang." Marie whispered beneath her breath as she groaned and slowly crawled out of bed. "It wasn't a dream." 

The floor of the shower room was cold against Marie's bare feet, but she didn't mind. In fact, she welcomed it. It reminded her of an echo of a memory she couldn't place. It filled her with a familiar comfort from her distant past. 

Distant...

The word stuck with her as she turned on the last faucet in the line of five small showers, sliding the curtain closed. Her past wasn't distant. It was forgotten. She knew some of yesterday and that was it. Her past was right behind her, breathing down her neck, yet completely unknown. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't look back. 

Perhaps it was for the best. After all, it gave her no choice except to look forward. But look forward to what? She had no clue what was ahead of her. No idea who she could truly trust. Until she learned who her friends are, she had her name and nothing more. 

A cold fear sent a shiver down her spine. She was alone. 

The realization was almost crippling. Until now, she had been uncertain, walking a thin line between faith and distrust. 

Then in a strange, masochistic way, she almost found it relieving. Finally, there was something she was sure of. She was alone. 

After cleaning herself all she could, Marie stepped out of the shower and got dressed, her eyes trained on the door constantly. When she first got up, she was looking forward to a cleansing shower and washing away every bad feeling as if they were simply a small bit of dirt. But her muddled thoughts distracted her, keeping her from enjoying it.

Marie hadn't realized how gross her old clothes were until she put on the ones Morgan had given her. They were a simple black tank top and a pair of blue jeans. There was also a loose olive-green long sleeve along with socks and undergarments. New clothes with the help of the shower made her feel a little better but she felt like was in a daze she couldn't snap out of. She braided her hair the best she could with its short length, pulling it out of her face. 

She didn't have a mirror, but she had an idea of what she looked like from what Newt had told her. 

Marie froze as she remembered the kindness the boy had shown her, and suddenly, doubt began to crawl back into her chest and the lines were blurred once more. Was there really no one she could trust? Could the sweet boy really be out to get her? Could they all be? There was no way to be sure besides spending more time among them. Perhaps she could gain their trust. She could be nice and play along. Learn more about them and uncover their secrets. It seemed like her only option. Marie silently pulled on her boots, securing her knife inside, and left the shower room, stopping by the hut to put away her old clothes.  

As she stepped out onto her rickety porch, the corners of Marie's lips tugged downward ever so slightly. She could smell the fresh soil from the fields in the northeast corner and hear the farm animals as they grazed just south of that. Straight ahead, passed the few trees her hut hid behind, she could see what Nick called the Homestead. She watched as boys milled around, getting their day started, their laughter rising in the air as they clapped each other on the back.