All for You ||Taegi|| -Yoontae-

Ch. 5

TW: Suicidal thoughts and trauma of a toxic relationship. Read at your own risk.
_______________________________
       
    The hell in me. That's all I see. Once
            in the dark, you stay in it...

Darkness.

That's all I saw.

The shadow lurking in his dreams. This is what he dealt with every night.

Cold sweats, and nightmares. I was used to it, but that didn't mean he didn't get scared.

Struggling to breathe. Struggling to hold on. And or what? For nothing. All, gone. What's the point?

The scars, they hurt. The demon just smiling through the trees, watching me. Breaking me, and building me back up.

It's him. He's back. Thought he'd gone, but why is he here? Why isn't he gone? I feel myself being suffocated in this darkness. Falling.

I run and run, but he's still there. At this point I'm panting for air. A stop won't hurt, right?

Wrong.

He started strangling me. The shadow, eating me, suffocating me. Then it vanished.

"Oh, Yoongi"

It mocked.

"Think you can run away from me? Funny, because I'm never letting you go. This is who we were, are, and will be. We're one, like it or not."

"No! We're not! I'm nothing like you"

I cried desperately, as I stumbled back and tripped, falling down on the crisp autumn leaves, whirling around in the chilly breeze.

"We don't have to part ways Yoongi. You will always be by my side. Always. Like it or not.

"No"

I whimpered, tears threatening to fall.

"Please, leave"

I begged.

But it only swept towards me. Strangling me.

"You can't run away! This is who we are supposed to be. Don you see?"

He smiled creepily.

"That kind who you wait is much for. You don't even remember him! What makes you think they remember you? They're not here to save you at they? No, right? You truly are pathetic, aren't you? Waiting for someone who doesn't remember you. Someone who you'll never see again. You're caged, Yoongi. Come back with me. Be my toy again. Nobody will love you like I love you."

He rasped, touching the wound he caused.

"Pretty souvenir, don't you think? How about another one? Would make you prettier."

He held my chin up, studying my face full of fear.

"Just remember. I'll be back. Sooner than you'd like."
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I woke up, trembling and sweating. I sat in the dark hearing nothing but silence. It was 2:37. In the morning. I sighed, sobbing my eyes out. Why did this happen again? Why does everyone hate me? Why is he back in my dreams?

Is this who I really am supposed to be. I don't want to go back. Not to him. The cause of my downfall and misery. I thought he was helping me, but he was just controlling me, like a puppet. He was right, I am his toy. Maybe I'm just not supposed to live.

I touched the scar he had made. It still hurt remembering that time. I looked at the others. The ones I had gladfully done, not so long ago.

I smiled sickly.

Maybe we could try again? Maybe this time I'll be gone. This way I won't hurt anyone and I wont have to deal with him.

A small cut won't hurt right?

I slowly got out of bed as I searched for the tiny, sharp blade I had hidden in the bathroom. It would just be a small one. I tip-toed across the room carefully and quietly, entering the quite large bathroom. I opened the cabinets. It wasn't there. Where had I left it?! Hoseok couldn't have found it, right?

I scrambled back to my bed space and started looking everywhere it might be.

Drawers? No.

Closet? No.

Bed? No.

Where could it be? Suddenly it clicked. Under the bed! I scramble dot my knees and looked under my bed. Fortunately, it was there. Good thing Hoseok didn't find it.

*Ring Ring*

Who could it be?

I answered my phone cautiously.

"Hello?"

I heard a laugh on the other end.

"I'm back."