Dalliance (on hold)

Colton

Nag took a step back, shock written all across her face. I didn't dare look her in the eye, so the air around us grew awkward. She opened her mouth to say something, and I grabbed her wrist.

"Let me talk to you outside." I pleaded with my eyes in the hope that she wouldn't say anything. She didn't say anything, but she let me lead her out the back entrance to the small smoking courtyard. "Let me explain." I said.

"Please do." She stared at me, waiting. I could sense the anger radiating off of her.

"I do have a girlfriend." I stuttered. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"That's your explanation?!" She screamed.

"Please, Nag. Please don't shout."

"Don't call me Nag." She growled. "You've not even told her. I'm the one you cheated on your girlfriend with. Are you taking the piss?"

"We're not that serious." I whispered. She just stared at me, silent. I think I'd prefer her to shout than stay silent. "I will talk to her about it."

"What about Molly at rowing?"

"That wasn't anything, I was just flirting."

"Why were you flirting?"

I paused, and she stood, waiting for my answer.

"I flirted to make you jealous." I bowed my head.

"What is wrong with you?!" She yelled. "Why would you want to make me jealous if you're the one that left me that morning?!"

"I don't know!" I yelled. "Because I'm a twat!"

"Yeah, you are a twat." She slapped me across the face, hard. Damn she was strong. I pulled my hand up to my cheek and held it. She looked at me for a moment, shocked by what she had done. And then she turned and walked back inside. After a few moments of standing completely still, I followed her back inside. She was walking quickly to the seated area where Tanya and her friends were talking. I practically ran to catch up with her, grabbing her arm to turn her around.

"Don't!" She screamed. I was relieved that the music was loud enough to cover up whatever she was shouting.

"Listen." I said in her ear. She pulled away quickly and looked disgusted that I had leaned in close to her. "Wait." I held my hand up to her to stay where she was, and pulled out my phone. I opened up a notepad app and started typing.

I left because I was scared. I knew what I had done and it scared me. And I want you to know that I wouldn't normally do something like that. But I felt like that night was my one chance with you, and I didn't want to let it go. I'm so sorry. But I left in the morning because I knew you'd be pissed if you knew the truth. I thought if we both parted ways and just left the whole thing then it wouldn't get anymore complicated. But then we were both at rowing and I got worried I'd fall for you so I flirted with Molly to make you jealous so you'd hate me. I know I didn't go about it very well. But I really like you.

I showed Nag my phone, and was pretty shocked when she actually read it. She started writing underneath, and then handed my phone back to me.

Fuck off.

When I looked up, she was already half way to the seated area. I stood still, watching her walk, knowing that there was nothing more I could do. She pulled her friends to the side and they all walked to the front entrance swiftly. And it was all over in a matter of seconds.

Tanya appeared at my side, gently grazing her hand along my back. She leant in to my ear.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing." I stopped. "Just an slight disagreement with a friend." She didn't look convinced, but she kissed the sides of my mouth anyway. I didn't kiss back right away, but when she frowned at me, looking for explanation, I decided that it was easier to just kiss her than to explain what I'd done.

We danced for a while, but my heart wasn't really in it. I drank a lot of beer at the bar, and downed a lot of shots to try and rid of the guilt and the heavy feeling in my chest. With no such luck. But now my insides were feeling warm and my head was fuzzy enough to not think constantly about Nag. I would say the same for Tanya, but it was pretty hard to get her out of my head when she was dancing in front of me, and sitting on my lap at short intervals for breaks.

The early hours of the morning came around quickly, and the bar was a blur of dancing figures. Tanya leaned in to speak in my ear.

"Are you staying at mine tonight?" She asked. I thought about her question for a while. It took longer for me to process the thoughts with the amount of booze inside of me. I know that I shouldn't have said yes. I know that it would only make the situation worse. But at the time these thoughts didn't cross my mind. I was too hung up on the alcohol, and the tiny dress that I had my arms wrapped around. So I smiled at her in response, and led her out of the club.