Camo and Navy Blue [A Bensler Fan Fic]

Eighteen

Olivia and Elliot didn't spend nearly as much time together now compared to when Kathy had just passed. They both were working hard, and Elliot was busy with the girls. But a week after Olivia promised to plan a date for them, they finally got to see each other again.

"I'm so glad that I could find a sitter for tonight." Elliot smiled once Olivia opened the door to her apartment. 

"I'm glad too. We haven't seen each other for a week, and I feel like days get longer when we are apart." Olivia breathed. She shut the door behind herself and Elliot, before feeling as his arms looped around her body.

It wasn't long before Elliot had kissed Olivia. They stood in the entryway, making out, but Olivia had to get Elliot to stop. She didn't want to rush things with him, especially since her last two relationships didn't end well. If they took it slow, then maybe they'd last. Maybe this relationship wouldn't end in heartbreak.

"Hey, slow down." Olivia mumbled, as she placed her hands against Elliot's chest and forced his lips from hers.

"What?" Elliot asked.

"Slow down. We don't need to rush this... if we truly want to be together, we have plenty of time for that. Now, take your jacket off and leave your boots by the door. I am making dinner." Olivia smiled. She stole one quick hug from Elliot before leaving him and moving into the kitchen.

///

Olivia prepared an entire dinner for herself and Elliot. She never was one to cook that often, but for Elliot and the girls... she will do anything.

"Have you been practicing?" Elliot mused, as he hesitantly poked at his steak. He was worried that it may be raw or completely overcooked.

"You may not want to hear this, but Thomas and I took cooking classes together. It was a gift from his mother for Christmas, and we went twice a week for a while." Olivia smiled weakly.

"So this won't kill me? Like, boxed mashed potatoes can't be too bad. But steak..." Elliot trailed off. Olivia let out a laugh before shaking her head.

"Everything is from scratch... just give it a shot. I promise you won't regret it."

Olivia dug in, and once she took her first bite, then Elliot took his. He was incredibly surprised, and praised Olivia for the skills she had mastered since they had last shared a meal.

After eating, Elliot helped Olivia wash dishes and clean up. Then once that was all taken care of, they settled onto the living room sofa and drank beers.

"So, how are you doing?" Olivia asked gently.

"What do you mean?" Elliot replied.

"Well, with Kathy's death... it's edging on a year, and I'm wondering how you are doing. If you are ready for everything that is coming at you lately." Olivia breathed.

"Oh, yeah... uh, I'm doing okay, I guess. It still stings to think about her, but the memories I have with her are worth it. I miss her, but then looking at our girls makes me realize she is always with me." Elliot said with a shaky smile. 

"El, if you aren't ready... please tell me."

"Olivia, I'm ready for this. To date you... to love you. I'm ready to move on, but only as long as you don't force me into forgetting Kathy."

Olivia leaned forward and placed her empty bottle on the coffee table. She turned to look at Elliot before shaking her head.

"Kathy was my friend, El. I loved her and the way you two invited me into your family with open arms. I don't want to forget her, so I'd never make you do that either. If this relationship turns into more, I will be there to always tell your girls about how amazing their mother is... was." Olivia breathed.

They sat in silence as both thought about the woman they lost. Olivia wondered if maybe she and Elliot would really stay together, because he would always love Kathy. Elliot was wondering if in the future he would truly be ready to marry Olivia and start a life with her when he couldn't move on completely from Kathy.

"We can work together, right?" Elliot asked.

"Huh?"

"We both have our problems, Liv. You have mommy issues and are probably terrified of ever having kids in the future... and I'm a widower who is raising two daughters that are the spitting image of their mother, and struggling to figure out if I will ever truly be able to give you my heart... completely."

"I can't promise that I will ever have kids with you, El." Olivia breathed, and Elliot nodded.

"I know that."

"Okay, so let's work together... we can try to figure things out slowly. We can give ourselves a few months of dating and then, if we change our minds, we can break up and going back to friends."

"Like a free trial." Elliot grinned, and Olivia chuckled.

"Totally. But in the end, we don't create another email to start over again if time runs out."

///

Elliot went home that night to find his girls sleeping in his bed. He got ready himself, before slowly climbing into Kathy's side of the bed. This is the first time he has ever laid on this side, but it was only because his girls were hogging his side.

Elliot watched as his daughters slept, and he was really realizing that he wanted to experience sweet and quiet moments like this with Olivia by his side. Kathy would want him to be happy, and he wanted that, too.

So Elliot pulled his phone out and dialed Olivia's number quickly. He rolled over onto his back and yawned as he waited for Olivia to answer.

"El?" Olivia asked, her voice full of sleep.

"I didn't say it before we left, but I just wanted to tell you something before we both fell asleep."

"Go ahead." Olivia laughed softly.

"I'd still like us to be careful and take things slow, but I know Kathy would want me and the girls to be happy. That she'd want me to move on... so I really hope that I can move on with you. I love you, Olivia. So do my girls."

Olivia let out a relieved sigh from her side of the call before whispering her response.

"I love you three more than I can ever describe."