More Than It Hurts You {Iromatsu}

Untitled Part 4

No, no, no! Shit, how could I have fucked up so bad?! I kept this secret for years for a reason! Oh, God, I had to get away!

I took off for the front door, shoving someone out of my way. Thank god I'd kept my sandals on. I heard yelling behind me, but in my panic, I couldn't tell what was said. I almost tripped as I rounded the corner and took off down the road. I could hear footsteps fast approaching behind me and cursed my lack of exercise, I knew I'd be too slow.

Two arms wrapped around me and picked me up. I tried to struggle, but it didn't do much. I looked down and saw yellow sleeves around my middle and knew fighting was pointless, but I had to try!

"Lemme go, Jyushimatsu! Right now!"

"No can do! Karamatsu-niisan's orders!"

Dammit! I didn't want to talk about this, I wanted to run away and avoid it forever.

When I was brought into the TV room, Osomatsu came over and grabbed my right arm, dragged me over to the wall, and pinned it there. Jyushimatsu did it with my left.

"C'mon! Lemme go! Assholes, let go!" I couldn't win against their strength, and it pissed me off. I wanted to start snarling and throwing insults, but then I felt a pain in my ribs.

I looked up and saw Karamatsu, grimacing while pressing on his injury.

"You reacted to my pain," he stated.

"N-no, they're hurting my arms! What do you want, why are you doing this?"

"I think," he said, walking up to me, face somewhat dark. I couldn't tell if he was walking so slowly due to pain or to intimidate me. If it was the latter, it was working. "You know exactly why."

He got right in front of me, making eye contact.

"Hold him still," he said to my captors.

He started to lean in, closer and closer. One hand went to my chin, tilting my head. What was he doing? The other hand tugged at the collar of my hoodie. I could feel his breath on my neck. My heart was racing. What was he-

"Ow!" I cried out as his teeth clamped down on my neck, biting hard. "Q-quit it!"

He complied after just a moment, pulling back, the hand on my jaw forcing me to look at him.

"You're my soulmate," he said in an angry disbelief.

No, that look... I knew it... I knew he'd hate the truth. It hurt to see it, even if I knew. There was no use denying it, but I still tried.

"I don't know what you're-"

A slap to my cheek shut me up fast. The hands pinning me let go, and I heard Osomatsu yell 'Woah, Karamatsu!' but I could only slump to the floor, holding my cheek. He'd never hit me before, and it hurt in more ways than one.

"Don't fuck with me!" Karamatsu shouted down at me. "I felt that!"

I looked up at him. I'd never seen him look so angry. My tears finally broke. Our brothers looked like they wanted to intervene, but held back.

"How long have you known?" He demanded to know.

I bit back a sob and managed to choke out, "Middle school."

There was silence for a moment, he looked slightly away, brows furrowed. Then his eyes darted back to me.

"That's what started it, then? That's why you started hurting me all the time? You knew, yet you've been putting me through hell all these years?? It was your fault I started wishing I didn't have a soulmate, so no one else would get hurt, but my own soulmate was the one hurting me the whole time?!"

I tucked in on myself, the tears falling freely.

"Why?! Why would you do this to me?!"

He was right to be angry. He was right to hit me. But somehow, it broke my heart that he was, that he had.

"I was, angry. It's disgusting... My brother, being my s-soulmate?? I could never be normal, because of you!" I managed between sobs. I wanted to continue, to explain, defend myself, but how could I? There was no good explanation, was there?

When I thought about my reasoning, it hit me just how fucked up it was.

"I... I didn't-" I tried, but he cut me off.

"I can't believe this. We could've-! Ah!" He yelped, and I felt the pain in his ribs.

"A-are you okay?" I reached up to him from the floor, sniffling.

"Don't- ack- pretend to care now! Just... don't." He suddenly looked so defeated. "Osomatsu. Help me to the hospital, please."

"Y-yeah, okay," Osomatsu stuttered, and rushed to help him, leaving his hoodie behind. I watched them walk away, feeling so much pain with each step.

I regret everything.