So I invited Zander over to play video games and i'm so nervous. I'm staring at my closet trying to figure out what to wear and it's already 7:15 so he will be here soon. I decided on a pair of black skinny jeans and a blue lacrosse hoodie. I'm really freaking out. what if he's straight? This thought never occurred to me until now, I just assumed he was. Right then i heard a knock on the door. I open it and say "Hey, come on in." Z:"Hey"
F:"So I was going to order food because I haven't ate anything since lunch. Do you want anything?"
Z:"Sure. I'm actually pretty hungry lunch today was so bad."
F:"haha it was so bad. so what do you want? I know that a Chinese place and a pizza place deliver here or we can go and pick something up."
Z:"I don't care what we get. Do you want something in particular?" I wanted so badly to say 'you' but I didn't. I don't want to scare him off. So I say "what about we go and get canes?" Z:"OHH that sounds so good. Let's do that." F:"Okay sounds good since I don't have my license you drive and i'll pay for the food." Z:"Sounds good let's go." We go and get into Zander's and he asks "Do we need to get your family anything?" F:"Nah Carter is going out after tutoring and my mom is working the night shift at the hospital." Z:"oh" I can tell he wanted to ask about my dad which I know talking about him won't go anywhere good but I still say "My dad is in the army, he's currently deployed." Z:"Your dads in the army? That's so cool mine is too." F:" yeah it's cool until he's gone all the time and he barely answers the scheduled calls. I haven't talked to him since he was deployed two years ago." Suddenly my hand is on my knee and i'm shaking. God I hate anxiety. Then Zander puts his hand over mine and says "Finn. your okay just try to calm down.That part of the army sucks I understand but it's part of there job and maybe he doesn't want to talk because he doesn't want feel hurt from hearing you guys but being able to be with you guys." I calmed down pretty quickly from hearing his voice, it's such a calming sound. Then his works sink in. "Yeah I understand that thanks and thanks for helping me calm down. sorry that talk got so real." Z:"it's fine i'm here to talk if you need to anytime just let me know." F:"Thanks" Then he goes to remove his hand and I grab it so we're holding hands. He turns his head and smiles at me and I smile at him. If this isn't a sign that he's gay then I don't know what is. We get to canes and we order and I give him my debit card. We then go back to my house and we eat and play video games until 10:00pm. Z:"Well it's getting late so I should probably get going." F:"Oh okay. I had fun tonight i'm glad you came over." Z:" I had fun too. Thanks for inviting me over." F:"Yeah anytime. well I guess i'll see you Monday then?" Z:"I guess you will. Bye." I said bye and shut door after he walked out. Then I went upstairs and went to bed.
