003; liar liar, our souls on fire

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by incarnadine-

by incarnadine-

                                    
                                              
OUR FRUITY SMILES PASS SECRETS TO EACH OTHER, WORDS DETAILING EACH OTHER'S ANATOMICAL WONDERS, KISSING EACH OTHER SHUT; MESMERISED BY THE ESSENCE OF OUR GALACTIC LOVE AFFAIR. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU. BUT. YOU DON'T YOU DON'T YOU DON'T.
I GUESS THEN WE'RE BOTH
LIARS

you think spilling your heart on paper will 
seal your bruised bones like a bandaid
no, no, no. it will tear open a fuck ton
of new ones too. because time isn't the
best healer. it's the best drug, to forget
your pain. and just like drugs, return 
the same pain back. a thousand fold.




you notice the things you didn't at first
repeating and loving like a broken record
so love starved you take anything you get
kissed him even if his tongue was lapped
in poison. love is a fucking ruination.
don't love little girl. because time's a villain, and it won't let you stay little for long.
i'm your alias, your alibi,
the one you refuse to acknowledge 
but fuck in hidden alleyways
the one your mother would hate
and your father can't tolerate
but can you?
if you can't love me, can you atleast tolerate my love?
or atleast pretend to?
i can bleed dry on this page over and over 
the ink of my blood might finish
but the ways you've wronged me won't
you killed me endlessly, and yet
like a dog, i begged for every glance
you'd spare me
but i don't deserve to be glanced over.
i deserve to be stared at and devoured.
i know that now.
but i wish i knew it the day you forced me to dye my hair red so i'll look more like her.
i don't hate you, boy.
i mean, i already have killed you
and that killed the hate in me.
atleast your corpse was worth something.
───
© erys aden 2022 | 18.02.2022
it's feb. february calls for love. february calls for eternal misery. cheers.
also, i'm finally sixteen.