Akin to Gods

chapter one

your previous life was nothing more than a strange dream now, almost 10 years after your original arrival in kattegat. thinking of it was like trying to grasp falling sand in your open palms or like trying to remember a dream you had a week ago. it felt like it wasn't real - what was real was kattegat and the people within.

over the years you had become someone that almost everyone in kattegat owed a favor to - you had begged floki to teach you to fight and to teach you woodworking as a child and he had granted you both.

floki and helga were good parents, better than the biological ones, from what you remember - and although you weren't nearly as good of a boat-builder as your adoptive father, you had learned your way around a hammer and nail. in fact, in a culture that was predominately community based, you had become a jack of all trades over the years, learning anything and everything you could because when you first arrived, you feared floki and helga would not want you. that kattegat would have no desire to shelter a strange child, so you had become as useful as you possibly could.

your mornings consisted of training and after that you would either help floki build or go into town to do any number of favors for the people. your days were busy and by the end, you were usually so exhausted that you would fall asleep on the beach before even reaching floki's home. but you couldn't complain and by now you were well liked by the majority of kattegat.

on this particular spring morning, you were on old man gunther's roof, repairing a hole that had been caused by the last storm of winter. in your hand was your hammer - a beloved tool gifted to you by your father. for floki had been proud of the fact that you had wanted to follow in his footsteps. where most might carry an axe attached to their belt, you carried the hammer.

as you pulled your hand back to begin hammering the final nail in place, a voice from below startled you into hammering yourself instead of the nail. with a curse, you looked over the edge of the roof, taking in the smug look upon ivar's face.

"ivar! you son of a -" you began, ready to curse him out for the pain he'd inadvertently caused you.

ivar's brows raised and he cut you off immediately, not allowing you to finish your sentence. "my mother is queen of kattegat, fenrir, i'd be careful of the next words out of your mouth."

you sighed and picked your hammer back up. "fucker," you proclaimed before hammering down the final nail and proceeding to climb down off the roof. "what brings your fool ass to find me today?" you ask him.

where others would not get away with such familiarity to the young, bad-tempered prince, he let it slide for you. years of floki teaching him had built up your friendship together. in fact, as children ivar would often sleep curled up against your side when he was at floki's cabin. of course once he was old enough to become embarrassed by his older brothers possibly teasing him for it, he had stopped. but you didn't mind - to a degree you understood that he did what he felt he had to in order to guard his heart from more pain.

"you haven't heard yet?" his question breaks you from your thoughts and you shrug. you'd been working nonstop all morning, whatever news that ivar had come to tell you must have been important. "ragnar has returned."

the long lost king finally returned after 10 years of being gone. you'd been there at the failed paris attack - you'd begged floki to bring you along, after all, ubbe and hvitserk were going and you and hvitserk were the same age, so why shouldn't you tag along?

you suck in a breath and look ivar over, trying to gouge his emotions on the matter. but as usual, he kept his face a mask - storing his secrets and feelings behind locked doors. but still you wondered why he was here, talking to you and not with his father. after all, you didn't need to be a mind reader to see the pain that ragnar had caused his sons all those years ago by abandoning them.

"why aren't you with him?" you ask, because it's better to be blunt with ivar, than to beat around the bush.

he shrugs, looking up at you from where he sits at your feet. with a huff, you plop yourself down on the ground next to him before he starts speaking again. "he's asking my brothers to raid with him, took them off to talk." although his voice was calm, you knew that being brushed off like that had probably been a blow.

with the sleeve of your tunic, you wipe sweat and dirt off of your face. "want to go spy on them?" your lips tug into a mischievous grin as you propose the idea. you were well aware that ivar liked to watch people when they didn't know he was around. after all, you'd caught him more than once spying while you washed. and you weren't sure, but you had an inkling feeling that he had been watching the first time that you and hvitserk had fucked.

so it took you by surprise when he shook his head. "im going back to the great hall to wait for my brothers to return. im sure my mother will want to know what's going on as well."

he must have really been hurt by ragnar, but you couldn't blame him. you knew he wanted you to follow him back to the hall, to wait by his side, but ragnar had been your father's best friend. it shouldn't be a gossiper who told floki of ragnar's return. so you said your goodbyes to ivar and ran off - legs carrying you back to the beach and to the cabin you called home.

if only you knew then that ragnar's return was akin to the end of your world.