Jaded heart

Our feelings

Donte pov 

The following morning I return to the hospital to make sure Gabriella is ok after leaving her last night, I don't know why I told her I love her or why I told her why she was asleep, I guess I just needed to say them out loud at least once to make sure I was right about my feeling and I am, I am totally in love with Gabriella and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.  I have a ring burning a hole in my pocket and I know its too early to pop the question but I cant wait and lose her again, I need her to be my other half, in the service its hard to find time to get to know someone and find out they are the one but I have and I believe she is my one. The idea of marriage scared me and I know it will scare Gabrielle considering we haven't told each other how we feel but I cant wait, I could be gone on another mission any time and I need to her to know how I feel and spend the rest of our lives together, I need her to know she's the one I want to be married to and spend the rest of my life with her. 

Walking though Gabriella door I spot her sitting up right and with a smile on her face, I return the smile and take a seat next to her looking at the monitor making sure she is ok as you cant take Gabriella word as she think she be ok and she wouldn't. Taking a hold on Gabriella hand I think about when the best time to pop the question but I know it doesn't matter about the time or location but spending the rest of my life with her and only her. 

"Gabriella I know we haven't put a label on us and we hadn't planned to but the more time I spend with you the more I fall in love, I promised myself I wouldn't fall in love with a service member but that was until you came along and I knew I would break my own promise just for you. You make me want to be a better man and I know its too soon but I can't live another day without you by my side, so will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?" I ask holding the ring up and on one knee, I look into Gabriella eyes and I see the tears rolling down the cheek, I knew she didn't expect this and neither did I but I couldn't go on a mission and let someone else come in, she's the one for me and I hope she realise I'm the one for her. 

"Yes, of course I'll marry you" I hear Gabriella say and before I heard the last few words I have placed a kiss on her lips and slipped the ring on her finger, I guess when you know you know, I wouldn't let a good thing like Gabriella slip though my fingers without putting a ring on it. From the outside of the service it would look quick but when your on the front line twenty-four seven you don't want to mess around and I would die a happy man with Gabriella by my side. 

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It has been a couple of days since I got down on one knee and Gabriella has been discharge and since she left the hospital the only thing that has been on her mind is attending the funeral of the fallen pilot and the platoon member she was working with and I totally understand why she would want to attend the funeral, she wasn't with him long but it doesn't take long to form a relationship in the service, like Emma and Gabriella they become fast friends after Gabriella took a bullet for Emma. I'm currently in Gabriella front room waiting for her to get dressed for the funeral and I'll be there for every step of this as last time she attended a funeral it was for her father and I could only imagine how much that took out of her. 

Sitting in the car with Gabriella next to me I know she's nervous as she's picking at her fingers which she does quite a lot when she's nervous which I have notice, I place my hand over hers to calm her down sightly but I know how she must be feeling as I have attended plenty of funerals over the years and it hurts more when you know the person. It doesn't take us long to pull up and Gabriella is first out the car needing the fresh air and I watch her every move making sure she's ok. Looking around for a second I spot the fallen solider platoon in the distance and we make our way over to them and the family too pay our respects. 

"I'm sorry for your lost" we both say and Gabriella gives the wife a hug followed by something she whispered but I wasn't close enough to hear as I was stood next to the platoon and when Gabriella wants to whisper she does without anyone knowing. The things she whispers under her breath when she walks away from me is something else, I would take the last of the milk and she would walk away calling me something under her breath. 

While we at the funeral of the fallen solider I can tell Gabriella mind is somewhere else and looking to where Gabriella is looking it takes me a minute to realise her father is buried here with his platoon and I want to ask her if she want to go to his grave stone but before the words leave my lips Gabriella has already walked towards his stone, I watch her move while watching everyone else move towards there cars for the after do at the wives house. I want to follow Gabriella but I know this is something she has to do on her own and as I spot her in the distance I see her lips moving and I hope she's doing ok but when she moves further along I slowly start walking towards her and only when I'm in ear shot I stop walking. 

"Jackson i'm sorry I couldn't make it too your funeral but I just couldn't bring myself to not after just losing my father, you have always been my second father and losing you both so shortly after each other broke me. I hope you forgive me and I hope I am doing you proud. I love you so much" hearing Gabriella talk I cant tell how much her father platoon meant to her especially Jackson, they was a close nit family and I could tell it hurt her more just missing the funeral of his. This is the closure she needs.