Seems like the world is going down, my dear

The firey red of the sunset

TW: suicidal thoughts

He was standing on the roof, looking down to the world one last time. He looked at the sky, which was dipped in the fiery reds of the sunset. It looked like the world was going down. Like the sun was finally dying.

Just like he was.

He saw trees, branches waving in the wind, almost as if they were waving their Goodbyes at him. He saw all the houses in his village. He knew some of the people that lived in those buildings, but most of them had remained strangers to him. He wasnt mad about that. He honestly didnt want to know these people. What he knew about them was enough for him to avoid their company.

He thought about who will find him in the morning. His mom? His sister maybe? Or a stranger? How would they react? He was pretty sure there would be rumors About him first. Thats how this fucking village works. Rumors had killed him, rumors would haunt his death. All those hurtful words he hears being mumbled behind him when he walks through the streets, echoed through his mind constantly. His death would finally shut them up. The rumors would turn into silence once it would be affirmed. The rumors that killed him, would be killed by his death. The people that dont care, would wish to have cared at least once.

He was standing up on the roof, looking down to the world one last time. The sky was dipped in the fiery reds of the sunset, making the world look like it was going down.

The world was beautiful.

He wished to never let his sight off this view. He didnt wanna leave this world. But he had made his decision.

Glimpses of memories came into his mind, memories of everything that had made him happy, although its been years since he has been happy. All the people he once loved, all the memories he made with them- he would leave all of that behind. He would never go to sleep again, never wake up again, never even take a breath. Was that really what he wanted? He had made his decision but was his decision the right thing to do?

He realized that these thoughts shut down his brain, his hands started shaking, his eyes became blurry, and he was so dizzy, he was afraid to fall off the roof. He didnt wanna fall. He wanted to be the one deciding when to hit the ground. His brain realized what he was about to do and desperately tried to get him off that goddamn roof the safe way. He didnt want to die. His mind didnt want to die. But he made his decision.

He stepped to the very edge of the roof. The tips of his shoes already werent touching it anymore. He was ready. If nobody comes to save him- he would save himself.

But suddenly- he saw someone on the floor in front of him. Did anyone really come to save him? Did anyone notice his absence and decided to go search for him? Was anyone worried about him?

His hope was being crushed by the fact that he didnt recognize the girl on the floor. No one had come to save him. Why did he even waste a thought on that possibility? Pathetic. When has anyone even been worried about him? Never. So why would they be now?

What are you doing up there? she shouted from the ground.

I dont know. He heard his own voice say without having much control about what it does.

Why dont you come back down then?

Because Ive made my decision.

Her voice sounded soft, like honey and milk floating together in a warm mixture of sweetness. A mixture so sweet, icy shivers would run down your spine when it touches your tongue. Her eyes were dark, just like her hair. Her whole existence seemed to be made of darkness. Darkness was the only word existing in his mind while he was looking at her.

She was just standing there, silently staring at him. God, he drowned in those eyes. They seemed to be as deep as the palace of thoughts that he gets lost in every night when he cant sleep.

Arent you afraid youre gonna fall?

He shook his head. He wouldnt fall.

What if you do fall?

I dont know.

What if the decision you made isnt the right one?

I dont know.

He tilted his head upwards so she couldnt see his eyed had filled with tears. The sky was dipped in the fiery reds of the sunset, making the world look like it was going down.

What are you gonna do now?

He didnt answer. He didnt know.

Are you gonna jump?

He looked down again.

But she had already vanished.

Too bad.

He would have loved to talk to her once again before the world goes down.