The Love of a Daughter

Letting it Out

Onika POV

"OMG BB!" i yelled running upstairs. I'm about to tell her my mommy is pregnant. I'm so excited about this. I can't believe it! I'm finally going to be a big sister.

Being a little sister for so long is boring. I'm tired of being told what to do.

You're probably lost. I have a big brother Jamie, on my fathers side. I call him JJ and he's 20. I haven't seen him recently due to his ex-girlfriend giving birth, i miss him.

"Yes Onika?" Bey answered sound all irritated. What's the heck is wrong with her. Hearing the tone of her voice really ruined my mood.

"Well never mind miss attitude. I'll celebrate elsewhere." i said walking out of the room. All she did was sighed heavily. Now i'm really confused I haven't did anything. Not to her at least.

Hearing that Mommy was pregnant really made me miss my brother. Since Bey wanted to have an attitude for whatever reason, I decided to call him.

"Hey Nika Bear! Why haven't you called me you garden gnome?" he really think he funny.

"Umm, that was so lame. But the phone works both ways sir. I should be asking you the same thing." I don't know why people always think I have to call first. Like bye.

"Well, my excuse could be that I have a three month old crybaby around the house. What's your excuse? You better not be messing with that boy again." he said. Always thinking he run something.

"My excuse eh? Well, I don't really have one. And no I don't talk to Ken no more. Well not as a couple at least. We broke up like 2 days ago?" i said the last part lowly. JJ had told me months ago to leave Ken alone.

He knew what Ken did on the streets and didn't want me messing with a street dude. But they're so fun! He wouldn't understand.

"2 days ago huh? When I recall months ago telling you to leave him alone. I don't think that was two days ago Onika. Why do you have to be so hardheaded?" he was really mad. But it's my life.

"Jamie, it's my life. Why do I have to stop talking to somebody because my brother doesn't like it? Before you got ole gurl pregnant I told you I didn't like her. Now your taking care of a baby alone because my assumptions were correct. That's not fair at all" i expressed.

"I'm trying to protect you Onika. I don't want you to make the same mistake I did and be walking around with a baby on your hip because your dude doesn't wanna help out. Or you turn out to be like 'ole gurl' and leave a baby with a dude. You can do better Pooh." I understood but he knows I would never do anything like that.

"Well I know I can do better and I would never do something so careless Jamie." i said seriously.

I'm too scared to even lose my virginity. I couldn't do that.

"Maybe you would know that if you were around more. Instead you chose to raise a child alone instead of coming over here more so you can get help. You know Mommy would help you. Even I will. I haven't seen my niece since she was born. That's kind of selfish JJ." i tried convincing him.

He makes things harder on himself. He knows he has help.

"Nika I understand what your saying. I really do. I just don't wanna depend on nobody else. Especially because you know Momma isn't my real momma. I just don't want her to get tired of me." he said.

"Jamie now you know that woman could never get tired of you. She would never treat you any type of way. Especially with what happened with your mother. That would be so wrong of her." I really felt for my brother. He went through some crazy shit.

"Now bring your ass over here and let me see my niece. You don't even live that far. Can't believe I never bumped into you at a store or something. I expect to see you here before the day is over. If not, i'll hunt you down you fucker." i said. I hung up so quick. I do not need him yelling at me for cursing.

"Mommy!" i ran into her room. She was watching some show about this lawyer or what not. Boring.

"Jesus what!? You better stop all that yelling and busting into my room. You might catch something you don't need to be seeing" she said causing me to laugh.

"Sorry mommy but JJ is coming over today! I'm so excited" i don't know why i'm acting like a big child.

"Finally that boy brings that baby over here. I'm tired of begging to see a grandchild" Yea he's definitely getting chewed out when he gets here.

"Aunt Carol?" Bey walked into the room causing us both to turn around. She looked like she'd been crying.

"What's wrong?" Mommy and I asked at the same time.

"Can I talk to you alone? Aunt Carol. Please?" Oh so she want me to get out ?

"So you want me to leave?" i asked in disbelief. What's so wrong with letting me know what's up?

"Get out Onika." mommy flat out said. Wow.

"Wow. Ok." i said walking out. Bey grabbed my arm before I could leave.

"I'm sorry it's nothing against you, I just don't want to let it out to you yet" she said.

"Ok" and I walked off. Did she not trust me? I mean I would understand. But jeez.

Beyonce POV

I wanted to tell Aunt Carol about the whole 'killing my father and now i'm a head Queen Pin" thing.

I didn't want Onika to know yet because.. well I just didn't. So, I went to the closest person I know to a mother.

"Auntie I have to tell you something. But please don't look at me differently after. It's been eating me alive since I did it and I take full accountability. If you want to send me away I totally get it." I rambled. I'm really scared. My stomach felt like it was doing flips.

"Chile stop rambling and tell me what's up. What ever it is you know I got your back 100%" she smiled. That made me feel a lot better.

"Ok. So. I don't know if you know this but, my father was a King pin in cali. When I ran away and went with Jay, I was trained to work with him. Which meant I was now apart of my father's rivalry. I recently killed my father. Not even 24 hours ago. So, that means I have to take his spot. My sister won't do it because she's in college and doesn't want anything to do with it. But, I have no choice. Since i'm the next in line." i explained crying softly.

I thought I would be confident in doing this but, i'm still in school. I graduate in a few months. I want to go to college, but having to do this would be impossible. I mean I could do it. I'm sure it'll be stressful.

"Aww baby. Please don't cry. I got your back ok? I get that if you don't do it, you could be killed. I've been apart of this life for some time now. My father was apart of that stuff. And now Robert, for years now. It's nothing new to me" she said shocking me. These people are more than I thought they were.