Wang YiBo decided to propose to his longtime boyfriend, Xiao Zhan, in his unusual but not unwanted way. Yet after a week of being engaged, Wang YiBo disappeared without a trace, leaving Xiao Zhan devastated and heartbroken.
For three years, Xiao Zh...
(Note: If you have read my other works, then you know I always associate a song to a particular chapter (if I use one, that is). The song above is one of my favorites. An oldie by The Beloved, but I like it sung by Sarah Brightman better. (I'm a big fan of Brightman. Discovered her when I was in high school decades ago when I heard Phantom of the Opera for the first time). Anyhoo, this song is very deep and very meaningful to me. In a sense, we tend look to others to save us, but in reality, no one can "deliver me" from my problems but me. My soul, on the other hand, I leave it up to God. I hope you like this song. And do forgive any errors. I think I broke my finger. Or at least injured it to the point it is swelling and painful. Like I said, life is a bitch and Lady Luck hates me. So much for the year of the Tiger, to which I am a tiger. Hear me roar. Grrr... *cough cough* Meow...)
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Xiao Zhan POV
What have I done?
I'm going to hell. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. No passing Go... just straight to fucking hell. There was no delivering me from my sins this time.
But... Fuck! What the hell was I supposed to do? I had to tell him something! And it wasn't a lie exactly. Not entirely.
"Xiao Zhan! What—!"
I shook my head and closed my eyes as if asking him to give me a second. But what I really wanted was some time to pull myself together. The moment I said those words my guilty conscience reared its ugly head and I regretted it immediately. What the hell was I thinking?
The man wasn't just shocked, he looked genuinely distressed at my so-called confession. My half-truth. On the other hand, the little white lie did the job I wanted if Xie Lian's stunned expression was to be believed. And yet...
A sudden overwhelming sadness crept over me. I felt bad for exploiting him like this. Playing dirty was never my cup of tea. But the desire to see my sweet Bo-di had intensified exponentially since coming here. This all-consuming need magnified until the sheerness of it suffocated me. Even worse, knowing he was so close yet still an ocean away made it more painful, more excruciating. Tears filled my eyes, blurring my vision, and I blinked rapidly to stop them from falling.
Taking a deep breath, I decided a little honesty was in order and to make up for my deception. If I had to lay my soul bare in the process, then so be it. Because how else was I going to find my Bo-di? My happiness, my entire existence, depended on this man's willingness to help me. And I was so tired. So very, very tired. These past three years were finally taking its toll and I didn't have the heart nor the willpower to continue anymore.
"When he left me three years ago," I began softly, "I was lost. He just... left. He didn't leave a note, or a message, hell, not even a voicemail. Nothing. He just disappeared." My voice shook with the intensity of my pain, but I plowed on. "I-I thought something might have happened to him. I called his parents, his best friend. Fuck! I even called all the police stations and hospitals in the area. Nothing."
