That One Magic Friend (Harley Quinn TV Series x Male Reader)

Her New Crew

On a train in the middle of a snowstorm on a cliff there was Harley, fighting.

Harley: "Dasvidaniya suka!" She shouts, kicking some guy out the train.

KGBeast: "You speak Russian?"

Harley: "I can only say two things. Eto glyuten? And the other one."

KGBeast slams down at Harley with his sword-gun hand, she backflips over him and he slices backwards, slightly cutting her hair.

She gets pissed and slams him in the face with her baseball bat, knocking him out.

She walks into the next car, where a warhead is locked up.

She goes to find a key on KGBeast's body, to find she needs to turn two keys simultaneously.

She finds the other key and attempts three different poses to reach both locks on the separate sides.

She finally gets both locks.

Harley: "Yes!" A buzzer sounds revealing that there is a third lock above her. "Oh, God! Are you shittin' me?"

The car door from behind her blows up to reveal-

Harley: "Joker! This is my score."

Joker: "Well, it was. [clicks fingers]." His three goons unlock the door with ease, giving Joker the warhead. "But it's mine now."

Harley: "The only reason you're getting this and I'm not, is you got a bunch of goons that do whatever you say." She motions towards the goons.

Joker: "That's not true! Goons, throw Harley out."

Goons: "Whatever you say, boss." As they grab ahold of Harley and throw her out.

Harley: "Whoa!" As her boots and bat follows her out into the tundra.

IVY'S APARTMENT

You are asleep on the couch while Ivy is making some tea.

The front door opens to reveal Harley in a state.

Harley: "I need a fucking crew."

Ivy: "No, you need a shower."

Y/n: "[yawns] No, she needs an entire car wash." You say as you get up.

-An hour later-

Harley in a bathrobe and head towel sits on the couch, next to Ivy.

Ivy: "So, you didn't get the warhead?"

Harley: "No. Joker stole it 'cause he had a crew. Like all real supervillains."

Ivy: "I mean, I get by just fine on my own. So..." She says as vines refill her coffee, give her her cookies and give her a shoulder massage.

Frank: "Your independence is quite inspiring."

Ivy: "Oh, can it, Frank."

Frank: "I love you, Ivy."

Harley: "You know, I could have really used either of your help out there."

Y/n: "I... was busy." You say from the kitchen, cooking eggs and bacon.

Harley: "Doing what, exactly?" She stands staring at you

Y/n: "...sleeping..." You say looking away.

Harley: "Mhmm..." She sits back down.

Ivy: "Honestly, I really think that crews are over-rated. You know, it's like, some very successful supervillains work alone."

Ivy: "Like look at this guy. Look at Dr Psycho. Perfect example. Doesn't have a crew, yet still taking on Wonder Woman. Like a champ."