The Little Things

26. Breathe

As Nina faded from view I closed my eyes and leaned against the garage. Everything was in pieces, just like the chunks of Quil's clothing that was scattered about the yard. With a sigh I began picking them up. If I couldn't clean up the mess of my life I could at least clean up the mess in the yard.

Jacob and Embry had dropped their shorts on the ground, so I grabbed them and placed them in the stash in the garage that Jacob had for emergencies. Quil's shoes were completely unsalvageable, so they went in the garbage along with the remains of his clothes.

Once the yard was cleaned of evidence I was again at a loss. I had no one to talk to, I didn't want to go home, and I didn't want to stay here.

So I walked aimlessly along the road that lead to First Beach. As I walked I agonized over what had happened.

I ended up at the beach and slowed my walk to a crawl. Eventually my feet halted and I stood still, gazing over the ocean before me. The sky was overcast as usual, and the air was cool. The beach was nearly empty as it wasn't a popular time of year to come down here.

The wind pushed against me and I wrapped my jacket tighter around my shoulders.

I don't know how long I stood there for, but as I did I heard several howls from the forest. I finally turned to leave when I began to feel chilled.

My feet slowly lead me back to Jacob's house which was still empty. And there I stayed. I couldn't bring myself to go to Emily's where I would inevitably run into the pack.

Hours later, Billy and Dad returned from their fishing trip.

"Where's Jake?" Dad asked when he saw me sitting alone, arms folded on the table, in the kitchen.

I glanced up. "At work. Or something. I don't know."

Dad frowned. "What's wrong? Did you fight? Do I need to give him a stern talk?"

"No Dad, we didn't fight. He told me we would talk later. I'm fine."

He didn't look convinced. "I'll talk to him."

I jumped up. "No, Dad. Don't. He hasn't done anything. I just made a mistake today. It's no big deal."

Billy cut in. "I'll make sure he keeps in line Charlie. If not I'll send him to you."

And then the conversation was dropped.

"You coming home tonight?" Dad asked.

"Do I have to? I'd rather stay. I've barely seen Jacob and he should be here tonight." I begged. I also really didn't want to see Bella. I couldn't deal with that right now. With the way I currently felt I would probably scream at her.

Dad thought it over. "I guess you can stay. No funny business." He warned.

My face flamed red. "Don't worry. That is not going to happen."

"Billy, I'm trusting you to keep an eye on them." Dad announced.

I sunk back into my chair, desperate for Dad to stop talking. I had never been more embarrassed. Dad settled down to watch a game with Billy before going home and I fled to the garage.

I lay down in the back seat of the Rabbit and closed my eyes. I just wanted this day to be over.

Apparently I fell asleep in the back of the car because I woke up and it was dark. I heard voices coming from the house and then footsteps coming towards the garage. I clambered out of the car in time to meet Jacob at the door of the garage. I meet his gaze and he smiled but I couldn't return it.

"Hey Jacob." I said lowly.

"Hi." His eyes flickered over me. "Is everything alright?"

I shook my head. "How is Quil?"