If You Love Me

Chapter 29: Puppy Love

You barely slept last night.

After the adverse reaction of Yoongi at the funeral, it's been hard to get some peace of mind. Secrets and scandals are coming to light fast. These days, it's all difficult to digest.

"Y/N," Your aunt hums tenderly.

You look up over your should I smile weakly, "Yeah?"

There's an odd look in her eye today, almost dishearteningly sympathetic, like an apology and a love letter stitched into one.  Her soft arms cradle you and her neck rests in the nook of your neck.

"How are you really?" She asks sweetly.

You inhale sharply, "Not great."

"I'm so sorry honey. I know we've had a rough patch lately... The way I reacted at the funeral, it wasn't right."

"I know." You say through a throbbing throat.

Chaerin pulls away and places her hands on your shoulder and smiles through teary eyes. "It's a long story. One day I will tell you."

You nod in solitude.

If there was one takeaway from all of this, it was that it is best to let the secrets come to you instead of confrontation. Even if you have to wait a long time, you can endure it through the hope of clarity in the future. Sometimes, it is better to stop worrying about what's ahead and to stop and smell the roses — enjoy life for its sweetness.

"Gosh, you look very pale. Did you eat yet?" Chaerin lights up her tone.

"No."

She gasps as if going on an empty stomach was a Greek tragedy. "Aw hell no! Here, take this and go to the convenience store with Coco. Get yourself some kimbap or a man."

You glare at her for mentioning the last option, but relent and take her ten dollars because food sounds like music to your soul at the moment.

"What?" She laughs, "Coco got you man last time. Who says she can't get another?"

You chuckle exhaustively, accepting the puppy's leash. "Alright, I'll go if it gets you to shut up."

Chaerin winks and shoots you a finger heart.

You can't help but laugh to yourself.

What a woman... Hopefully that is not what your future looks like.

You crouch down and call out Coco. Her beady black eyes shine up at you so brilliantly. She isn't as small as she used to be, but her wagging tail still gives away her youth.

"You ready to go on a walk?"

The chocolate labrador barks back and smiles with her tongue hanging in anticipation. Though walks don't entertain you the same way, thankfully that pup's got enough excitement for the both of you.

You take in the crisp autumn air around you, a thing you didn't know you could miss so much after being in the stuffy hospital for so long. The trees flash off their marigolds and ambers, covering the city like a fresh mural. They say spring brings love in the air, but there's a maturity that comes with fall — the closing of the summer of youth.

It feels like so long ago your friend blew all your money on the credit card.

Now, there's only a few weeks left until leave for Seoul for your next university semester.

You pause in your tracks.

So soon? 

Your heart dulls with pain as if someone were clenching it with their fist. Who knew goodbyes were harder than hellos?