CREATURE → JIGYU

eight

"what else do you do in the city?" mingyu whispers in the dark of his room.

jihoon smiles, combing his fingers through the boy's hair as he lays in his lap. mingyu leans into his touch, pleased by his petting as if he's a sleepy puppy.

"well," he begins, "there are restaurants and street vendors where we eat together with our friends. and art museums and shopping malls. libraries with hundreds of books and attractions of every kind. and every night after it gets dark, there are colorful signs that light up the sky."

"wow," mingyu sighs, gaze distant. "i don't even know what some of those are. it must be so beautiful."

thinking of the concrete jungle he calls home, jihoon hums. "it depends on your point of view."

mingyu rolls onto his back, looking up at him properly. jihoon traces the concentrated furrow of his brow with his thumbs.

the silence between is filled with the sounds of cicadas singing and frogs croaking in a distant pond until, finally, mingyu voices the question tumbling around in his pretty head.

"do you think it's beautiful?"

jihoon weighs his answer, knowing it could affect how mingyu sees things. his curiosity and naivety was precious, almost. able to be tainted.

he didn't want to lose that spark of wonder, but would he be able to forgive himself if he lied? if mingyu discovered that he betrayed his trust?

so when he answers, jihoon is honest.

"not as much as others," he begins, choosing his words carefully. "sometimes i feel lonely."

"but what of the others?" mingyu asks, fiddling nervously with his nails. he's the picture of innocence this way, with big eyes and a tiny voice. "are you not with them?"

and jihoon smiles, understanding what has the boy confused. "it's not like that, darling.

"you know how you don't have anyone to talk to? no one to call you by your name? only flowers and trees and the river?"

he seems to recognize the feeling.

"you feel so small," jihoon continues. "maybe you want to shrink in on yourself. and you want someone to be with you— be there for you— but there just isn't."

mingyu admits, "yes. i do."

"that's what it feels like. except you're surrounded by people."

jihoon waits for his reaction, expecting  a soft, shocked comment. but after a few seconds to absorb his words, mingyu sits up suddenly, turning to face him.

he looks more determined than ever, face red and eyes glistening in the moonlight with unshed tears.

"i don't ever want you to feel that way," he says, voice shaking. he lunges forward, embraces jihoon in a tight hug, and says into his hair, "never. i don't want you to be sad, jihoon."

returning the embrace, jihoon attempts to soothe him. "it's okay, darling. i'm not sad right now, okay? i'm never lonely when i'm with you..."

and mingyu cries, snot and hot tears running down his face. jihoon wipes away his tears, grimacing when he sniffles messily.

"but when you leave..." he sobs, dissolving into another fit before he can finish.

"...i won't be with you anymore!"

"why are you crying so much, mingyu? poor thing, it's okay. i just wanted you to understand. even when i leave, i'll come back to you. i will. i promise."

the settle down in bed, mingyu curling his large body around jihoon, holding him as if he is very precious.

jihoon makes sure to comb his fingers through mingyu's hair to keep the boy calm, hoping that all that excitement tired him out enough to rest.

"do you promise?" he whispers into the night.

"i pinky promise," jihoon replies. he holds out his pinky.

"what's this?"

"it makes a promise extra strong. it means i have to follow it." he links their pinkies together, showing mingyu how to press their thumbs together. "there. now it's sealed."

"jihoon?"

"hmm?"

"thank you."

"anything for you, darling."