Darkwood Falls Paranormal Investigators Book One: The Dead Truth

Chapter Nineteen

"If he be Mr. Hyde," he had thought, "I shall be Mr. Seek." -Robert Louis Stevenson, The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde "

     Are you ever going to talk to me again?" Brandon asked me Monday morning in the car on the way to work. 

     I spent the night on Nick's couch Saturday night and most of the day on Sunday.  Nick had been a big comfort providing me with pizza and alcoholic beverages while we watched a marathon of The Office on Netflix all day long.  I finally went back to mine and Brandon's apartment around 10:00 pm, and went straight to bed without talking to my cousin.  As Brandon made attempts to talk to me in the car that morning, I rested my chin in my hand, leaning against the car window, still refusing to respond. 

     "You do realize we live and work together, so it's inevitable that you'll have to talk to me again someday," he went on. 

     "No, it's not," I said, still staring mindlessly out the window at the passing cars covered in snow. 

     "Ha!  See?" Brandon said. 

     "Fuck," I mumbled, purposefully hitting my head against the window. 

     "I'm sorry, Shawn.  How many times do I have to say it?  I know I didn't go about things the right way. " 

     As I stared down at my hands folded in my lap, I felt that intense guilt I felt Saturday night when I realized how I really hurt him.  Shouting at him and storming off to stay at Nick's was probably one of the shittiest things I had done to him.  I remembered that he had always been my best friend growing up, and the relationship we had started back up after so many years of not seeing each other, was not how I remembered it being.  I had changed.  I was harder and colder than the Shawn he had known as a child.  How did I let myself get so broken that I took it out on the people that actually loved me?  I then realized why Nick had acted the way he had when Jackie had broken up with him.  I understood him better, and I felt even worse remembering, once again, the awful things I shouted at him the night of my first investigation. 

     "Hey, you threw a book at my head.  Didn't that make you feel a little better?" Brandon's voice interrupted my thoughts. 

     "To be fair, I wasn't really aiming at your head.  I was trying to throw it at the bookcase behind you just to scare you, but I didn't realize it was actually going to get that close to your head," I explained. 

     It was true.  I never really meant to physically harm him with a large textbook that probably cost $10,000 from the local college. 

     "How can I make it up to you?" he asked. 

     "Just never lie to me again," I said, finally meeting his eyes with my own. 

     "Deal." 

     "And you have to buy me tacos.  I want some fucking tacos, and I think you should have to pay for them," I went on. 

     "Fine." 

     "Is there anything else you've been lying to me about?  We might as well get it all out now." 

     "Oh, um . . . " 

     "Don't fucking tell me there's more," I said, feeling exasperated.  "Do I have some long lost sibling who is a ghost or a serial killer. . . . or both?" I joked. 

     "Don't be ridiculous," he said. "It's just . . . I'm gay," he said quickly, avoiding my eyes. 

     I paused before responding and looked at him thoughtfully.  He was extremely determined not to look at me.  "First of all, I know.  Second of all, so what?" I said.