Bucky's Choice

Chapter 25

Bucky's knee shakes as he waits for Nat. Over the last couple of days, they've been texting each other. He suggested they meet at his favorite café by the bar. He checks his watch and sees she is running a little late. Did she forget? Did she back out? As these thoughts start to invade his mind, Nat shows up. "Sorry Barnes, traffic was a bitch getting across the bridge." "That's ok" He pulls out her chair for her and she thanks him. They order and he nervously asks her "So, how did you get started with your current job?" Over the next several hours, they talk about each others lives and catch up. Nat knows she has to tell him about Kelsey, but she doesn't know how. "I have a question Barnes." "Shoot." "Why did you and Steve wait to get married? I figured you would have married as soon as possible." Bucky contemplates saying, but he knows that it's best not to hide. "Well, frankly, Steve and I broke right after you left." "You're fucking kidding me!" This makes him laugh a little. "After losing Kelsey, than you, I wasn't a good person to be around. And neither was Steve. I told him I needed space and I went to Wakanda for a while." "How long is a while?" "Almost 2 years." "Damn. Why didn't you try to find Kelsey?" "Why would I want to try to find her? She left me, again. She was the one that didn't want to be around me." Nat is stunned at this. This is totally the opposite of what Kelsey told her. "I just thought that maybe you would've wanted to talk to her." "Well, after some time, Steve found me and we basically started over." "I'm sorry Barnes. I wasn't trying to upset you." It's ok Nat. I guess it's still a sore subject for me." "Do you still hang with any of the Avengers?" "Not really. I still talk with Wanda when she is around, but her and Vis travel a lot. Pietro is still an Avenger, but he does a lot of missions. What about you?" "When I left, Steve made it very clear that if I left, I left everyone. I accepted this and have abided by it as well." "Can you tell me what exactly happened? I mean I know what Steve and Sam said, but I would like to hear it from you. Why did you leave?" Nat smiles and sips her coffee. "That story is for another time when I have had something stronger than coffee in me." Barnes chuckles. "All right." Nat decides to try and prod him a little. "If you could talk to Kelsey, would you? I mean you don't have to answer, but I'm curious." He thinks about this very hard. "I don't know. There is a part of me that needs that closure, but then there is a part that doesn't want to trudge up the past." "I understand." She looks at her watch and starts to stand up. "Well, I'm off to work. Listen, can we meet up tomorrow? Same time, same place?" "Absolutely." They kiss each other's cheek and walk off in different directions.

"Where were you this morning?" Kelsey was just finishing making lunch as Nat walked into the door. "Had a coffee with a friend." "This friend wouldn't happen to have a metal arm and sexy baby blue eyes now would he?" Nat stares at her and she can't lie to her. "Maybe?" "Natasha Romanoff, don't lie to me." "Yea. I met up with Barnes. The bar the party was at? It was his." "I thought the bar was called the Brooklyn Bar?" "He changed the name." "Nat, I don't mind if you meet up with him. He was your friend before you even met me." Kelsey goes over to her and kisses her sweetly. "It's ok, I promise. Now eat." While they eat lunch, Nat decides to approach the subject of Bucky. "I have to ask, how did you know I was meeting him?" Kelsey swallows her bite. "I saw your text notification when you were in the shower this morning. Hard to miss his name plastered across your locked screen." "Why didn't you say anything then?" "It wasn't my business. I figured if you thought I needed to know, you would have told me."  "Kelsey, I think you should talk with him." "Nat, please. Let me enjoy my lunch." "Kels, he seems to think that you left because you were scared of him and never wanted to see him." "What? That's so stupid! Why on earth would he think that?" "I don't know. Maybe you should TALK to him and find out." "It's been too long and I'm with you now. Happily, I might add." Nat takes her hand. "And I am happy as well. But I know that you need closure and so does he." "I don't know Nat. How did he react to you when he found out we were married?" "Umm, I never got around to telling him." "Really Nat?!" "What? It never came up!" "Look, why don't we meet for coffee tomorrow. We can talk about this more and enjoy the day together ok?" "Fine." 

The next morning, Bucky was back at the café and anxiously waiting for Nat again. He hasn't told Steve about her, mainly because he remembers they didn't part on good terms. 

Four and a half years ago

Bucky returned from his recon mission to a house in chaos. Steve wasn't there to greet like usual, Wanda and Pietro were MIA, and Bruce was avoiding everyone. He went to be debriefed with Sam and that's when he found out what happened. "Nat left the Avengers." "What?! Why?" "I'm not entirely sure, but her and Steve got into it and just like that Nat quit and left." "This doesn't make any sense Sam." "Then you need to talk to your sour pussed boyfriend who seems to be turning everyone into an enemy lately." Bucky marches to his room and finds Steve reading in bed. "Steve, what  the hell happened? I leave for two days and Nat leaves?" "Buck, she didn't want to be here anymore, so she left. That's her right if she wants to go." "Bullshit! She loved this place. She wouldn't just leave without a good reason." "Bucky, please. Will you stop yelling at me? I didn't make her leave." "You two apparently got into it so what happened?" "I tried to convince her to say. We argued. She left." "Why is everyone leaving? Wanda and Pietro are gone, Nat, Kelsey." At Kelsey's name, Steve got angry. "No, don't you do that. Kelsey left us out of selfishness. Wanda and Pietro will come back and Nat will too." "I can't do this anymore." "Do what Buck?" "This. I need to figure out some things. I need to figure out me." Steve realizes Bucky is talking about leaving. "Bucky, please! Do not break up with me. I love you, we can figure this out together." "Steve, I do love you, very much. But I need to process this in my own way. This is just a break. I need a break. Please understand." Steve kisses him hard and full of passion. "Bucky, James, please don't do this."  Bucky gathers his things and goes to tell Sam he was leaving. "Is this what you really want?" "Yes. It's what I need." "Well you're always welcome back." Sam shakes his hand and Bucky calls his manager of the bar, Lois, to arrange him being absent for a while. A couple days later he arrives in Wakanda, T'Challa greeting him personally. "White Wolf, welcome back." "Feels good to be back." 

Pulled from his memories, a voice that he has dreamt about for years startles him. "Oh I am so killing Nat for this." He turns around and sees Kelsey standing behind him, her arms crossed across her chest, her face scrunched up in a scowl.