broke / machine gun kelly

6.

i stayed with the boys for the next two days. kells took me to work in the morning and picked me up again. otherwise i was a mess. my closest friend was gone and my last words to him were 'fuck you'. i couldn't forgive myself. i was losing more and more of my lust for life and questioned everything. the boys did make me food, and normally i accepted everything i could get, but this time i didn't eat anything anymore. i was an empty shell.
"hey chels are you listening to me?" kells snapped me back to reality "i ran you a warm bath and made mac n cheese. you need to eat" he said worried.
"I'm fine, I don't need anything" I tried to convince him but it was no use.
kells picked me up and carried me into the bathroom. i tried to stop him but i couldn't. he put me in the full warm bathtub with my clothes on.
he managed to put a smile on my face even in the worst time in a long time. he sat down in front of the bathtub and handed me a bowl of food and then took his bowl. we sat in the bathroom for an hour, i ate my noodles and we laughed. he was a gift.
the water was getting cold. kells helped me out of the bathtub, brought me dry clothes, and then left me alone to get dressed.
i walked back into the living room and kells asked me if i wanted to watch a movie. i nodded and sat down with him.
"thanks for everything but i'm off again tonight" i said quietly. i didn't want to get on the boys nerves anymore.
"no you can stay" he said.
"thanks but-".
"you have to learn to trust people and accept help. slim, dub and i have talked. we all think you can stay longer. we'd rather have you here than on the streets. right now" he looked deep into my eyes. i tried to argue against it but had no chance. i let it go for now. we watched a movie and kells snuggled up to me a bit. i let him. i remembered ethan's words when i first told him about kells. he said that i should just let things happen. i felt comfortable and safe.
dub and slim came home and brought friends. the living room was full.
people were drinking a lot of alcohol. it was like a small party. i told kells that i couldn't take it right now and he said that i could go to his room. i snuggled into bed. i was tired and exhausted. there was a knock on the door "hey can i come in?" kells asked. i nodded and he sat on the bed next to me.
"you can also watch tv" he laughed.
"yes but i'm used to the silence" i smiled back.
"if you like we can watch something together".
"but your friends?" .
"i don't feel like partying" he smiled. i moved to the side and made room for him in the bed.
i finally fell asleep later.
I woke up the next morning in his arms. it felt so strange but good. he managed to break down my walls more and more. i finally tried to let people get close again, other people who weren't ethan.

the next few days got better. my job was going well, my boss gift me a phone so i could finally be reached. it was my first real, actual phone. i was so proud.
i was still staying at the boys house. i had the feeling that something was developing between me and kells. he wasn't sleeping on the couch anymore, but with me in your bed. we occasionally cuddled a bit. he made me smile and we had great conversations. i still missed ethan like hell but i had to move on. it was what he would have wanted.

today was the day. kells and slim had their gig. the boys were super nervous and excited. kells took me to work and i agreed to come with them tonight.
i was off work and kells picked me up again.
"well are you ready?" he asked with a big grin.
"ready for what?" i asked.
"we're going shopping" he shouted loudly. i had to laugh "we decided that since you're living with us now, you'll get space in the closet and you can buy cool clothes now". i laughed and tried to argue against it but once again i had no chance. besides, he was right. i had my first money check. i never had so much money in my life. i hardly had any clothes because something always got lost on the street. it was time for me to buy at least one new outfit.
we drove into town and walked from store to store. it was super fun. i bought two new pair of black jeans, three t-shirts, a pair of new shoes and a jacket. i have to admit, we found a good store with special offers. it was a lot cheaper than i expected even though i still felt bad spending my money on clothes. but i couldn't walk around in kells clothes all the time.
we drove back and got ready for the gig.
i put on my new outfit and ran to kells in the bathroom "can i come in?".
"sure".
i looked in the mirror and couldn't believe how good i looked. tears welled up in my eyes. i was damp, my hair looked good, the new clothes, wow. it had been a long time since i looked this good.
"what's wrong?" kells asked worriedly when he saw the tears in my eyes.
"nothing, just i look pretty" i said.
kells smirked "you always look pretty".
i felt how i blush.
then we made our way to the club.