Laurens: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?
Lafayette: Several traffic violations.
Hercules: Three counts of resisting arrest.
Alexander: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.
Lafayette: Also, that's not our car.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alexander: I think we're missing something.
Laurens: Teamwork?
Lafayette: Cohesion?
Hercules: A general sense of what we're doing?
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Eliza: Have you seen a person named 'Alexander' around here?
Lafayette: Ugh, yes. He made a horrible mess of the blood fountain.
Eliza: It looks fine to me?
Lafayette: IT USED TO BE WATER!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alexander, setting down a card: Ace of spades
Laurens, pulling out an Uno card: +4
Lafayette, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you
Aaron Burr, trembling: What are we playing?
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Alexander, about Aaron Burr: Apparently we're getting someone new in the group.
Lafayette: Are we stealing them?
Hercules: New or used? Laurens: Are they short like you?
Alexander: Wonderful responses, all of you.
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Alexander: Hah! 69! You know what that means?
Laurens: What?
Lafayette: That you're a child.
Hercules: HOW'D YOU GUESS MY IQ!?
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Lafayette: Why are Alexander and Laurens sitting with their backs to each other?
Aaron Burr: They had a fight.
Lafayette: Then why are they holding hands?
Aaron Burr: They get sad when they fight.
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Alexander: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions?
Laurens: Put spaghetti in it.
Alexander: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you.
Lafayette: Put spaghetti in it.
Alexander: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two.
Hercules: Put spaghetti in it.
Alexander: I'm no longer taking suggestions.
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Alexander: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three-
Alexander and Laurens, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks!
Hercules: Our turn, Lafayette! One, two, three- vanilla!
Lafayette, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.
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Alexander: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Lafayette: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Charles Lee: I got distracted about halfway through.
King George: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alexander: Why is Eliza so sad?
Charles Lee: They took one of those "Which Character Are You?" quizzes
Alexander: And...?
Charles Lee: She got Alexander.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alexander: I think Lafayette was right.
Eliza: I'm surprised he hasn't marched in here to say 'I told you so.'
Laurens: He wouldn't do that.
Lafayette: You're right, Laurens. For once in your life, you're 100% right. I would never say that.
Lafayette: *turns around, the shirt he's wearing says 'Lafayette Told You So' on the back*
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Alexander: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys.
Eliza: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!
Charles Lee: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies' eyes!!!
King George: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.
Alexander: If you touch my birthday cake I'll make you eat your hands.
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Alexander: *Screams*
Laurens: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Eliza: Should we do something?
Angelica: No, I want to see who wins.
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*Angelica's helping Eliza out after they get injured, while the others are watching*
Alexander: How does Eliza look?
Peggy: A little better than you, actually.
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Angelica: Wake me up...
Eliza: Before you go go!
Peggy: When September ends...
Alexander: WAKE ME UP INSIDE-
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Alexander: There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.
Eliza:
Peggy:
Laurens:
Everyone Else At Alexander's Surprise Birthday Party:
Eliza: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Police Officer: You're receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Lafayette: Shit.
Laurens: Wait, three?
Police Officer: Yeah?
Laurens: OH MY GOD ALEXANDER FELL OFF!!!
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect Hamilton Quotes
FanfictionSomething I did during Covid (We don't talk about Covid) Buckle up, buttercup, 'cause this is gonna be a bumpy ride... ~ Also republished bc I felt like it 😤
